Alice hates ...

I've moved!

2008-06-30T15:51:00.000-07:00

And not to Atlanta! More specifically.

I've moved the blog. I'm at McShank.tumblr.com. I waited a bit, because I wanted to generate some good posts. But I'm liking tumblr more lately cause there's more you can do with it.

Come say hi, and update your links?

Beeeefcake

2008-06-01T13:53:00.000-07:00

Have you guys seen Cassie's myspace page? It makes me BLUSH. For shame.

So, this weeeeeeek...

I went to the gym a few times. It's not far, but the gym out here SUCKS. A lot. Compared to the one in Goodyear, it's like.... It's like the LA Fitness in Goodyear compared to the Lifetime Fitness in Goodyear. It's just that lame. But I still go! I took Matt today. He got all sweaty. And he doesn't play with me like Rachel and Esther do, which is good for my workout but boring for the two hours I spend there. I guess I'll get a radio tuner for my iPod in case he keeps going with me. I at least could have watched the Wedding Planner today. (That's right, I like J-Lo movies.)

And I have a shiny new Bank of America checking account. That's something. Accomplished. Ummm, yeah.

And I did some job stuff! Like, looked around. Spotted some things. Spotted a definite lack of things I want to do. I'm hoping I can just wait long enough and someone will just walk by and give me a job.

Or I can work at an ice cream shop. I think I'd make a cute ice cream girl. No pressure, no expectations. And ice cream. And I'll have curly pig tails...

Yeah, so I spend a lot of time these days fantasizing on the things that I could do, but would most likely be not the kind of thing I should be doing.

Or like a bookstore, right? I'd wear my glasses every day.

And then there's grad school.

Anything to avoid getting a real job I think.

Well, that's all I've got for now. Off to pen an email to my mum and daaaaa.

-Ace

Sugarpie Reynolds

2008-05-25T15:15:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone!

We just got back from Sunday's Dbacks game. Another win, and another great time. This time, the editor of the AJC gave Matt tickets for this game, so that was really nice. We did the Auggie Ojeda cheer (Auggie is our back up second baseman. So it's like having a special cheer for a nobody. Except I honestly like Auggie.) and that's where we stand up and yell, "Auggie Auggie Auggie, Oy Oy Oy!!" And all the Braves fans stare...

Great times were had. What else is new?

Yes, Leah wins in comments for the Matt can't work a can opener post. I'll just buy bagged veggies and be happy he eats veggies period. Very wise. But my Dad is runner up, with sage advice: never let him near my car.

We took a trip out to Atlantic Station yesterday to see the new Indiana Jones. I liked it. I won't say too much, but I don't think I'm spoiling if I say the plot revolves around aliens. And that's wierd for an Indy movie. But it's still fun and the Le Beouf is great.

Job hunting starts in earnest Monday. Waiiiiit that's Memorial Day, let's make that Tuesday. I'll have more to report then.

Alice

Matt does not know how to use a can opener.

2008-05-21T18:44:00.001-07:00

OMFG.

Seriously. I'm making dinner right now and he can't open the green beans. This is the funniest thing I have ever seen. Oh dear lord.

He's sitting at the coffee table now, can opener in one hand and can in the other, softly saying, "I've done this before."

He's been at it for four minutes now. And the prognosis does not look good.

Updates!

2008-05-17T17:05:00.000-07:00

Aaaaah, home again. I swear, I'm exhausted. I got eight hours of sleep, I suppose, but my body prefers I start that before 2 a.m.

I'm in the living room, watching baseball with Matt. His team, the A's, are in town playing the Braves. We'll go to tomorrow's game, too, and it'll be the first time seeing his team live in like two years. So it's an exciting weekend. And next week the Diamondbacks play Atlanta so I can see them too.

So, shopping! That's what we did today. We started off at the Steak and Shake for lunch. It's pretty lame burgers, but the shakes are great. And the equivalent I could come up with is like, if Johnny Rockets had a drive through. And was a Denny's half-breed. So... there's nothing really worth driving out of our way to have it again, unless I have a strong and unsatiable craving for a milkshake.

But after that we hit up The Container Store. Which all my friends and family will recall as my favorite store I don't live by. Up until now that is. Really, knowing Atlanta had one made the move a little better. I may have to move all my stuff across country but once I'm there, I can find a smarter way to contain it all. Excitement.

We spent $200 there. On cute caddys to sort bottles under the sink (in green and blue). And on plastic storage drawers to hold all my extra bathroom stuff. Shampoos. Bedhead Shine Spray. All the mascaras. Oh, and hangars, in turquois! And then underbed storage bins.

Oh, and Matt bought me this month's Real Simple. :) He's so cute.

Anyway! We ran all that home, through traffic at 4 p.m. Dropped it off, then ran back to Ikea at Atlantic Station (it's nearby, a http://www.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gifreally nice outdoor mall/shopping center).

At Ikea, after much browsing and deliberation, we picked up:

-One blue rug. (To add color to the living room, which I've been filling with neutral colors too much.)
-A new quilt and pretty white duvet cover. It's got a cute floral pattern done in flat and shiny thread, so you can only see it up close and with light... I'm very excited.

And that's all we took home tonight. Tomorrow morning we're having the following delivered:

-Side table.
-Dresser.
-Bed, with a box spring that we got on as-is clearance at a huuuge deal.

So now, like I said, I'm home and tired. Frozen pizza for dinner. I have to go grocery shopping tomorrow, in addition to cleaning and putting things away. And the baseball game. But it should be more fun than not.

If you're wondering- the drive went well. No tickets and the neon was a trooper. The weather was even pretty good, just a teensy bit of rain through Louisiana or so. It was great to see Raf, Leah and the Quattrinis in Houston. We grabbed a hotel room for San Antonio and spent a day- Tuesday, I think- doing the River Walk and the Alamo. Oh my, I was so excited for Matt at the Alamo. I have pictures to prove it, I'll post in a few days. We also spent a whole day at the beach in Galveston, which was perfect, and probably my very favorite part, and then I took Matt to the Space Center at the Lyndon B. Johnson Nasa thing. Also fun.

Aaaaah. That's the day. I'll post pictures next time.

Ace, signing off.

New home!

2008-05-17T10:00:00.001-07:00

I made it back to Atlanta.

We got in at 1:30 a.m. today, unpacked the car, then went to sleep. Woke up at 10 a.m., had a waffle, unpacked the boxes. Stuff's a mess right now, mostly because I don't have any place to put stuff. We did the Wii early this morning and took a break to play MarioKart.

Plans for the day: Eat at Stake and Shake (it's a chain out here. I'll report on that later.)
Do some shopping
Research armadillos and pollywogs (Are pollywogs a real thing? Are armadillos mammals or reptiles? These are leftover thoughts from my trip.)

Oh, Esther! There's an Estherwood. Somewhere in Louisiana. And, we decided that Sarah McLockland looks like Esther. However you spell that. (Not the other way around because Esther is prettier.)

Sooo, I'll post more tonight. The cat has been meowing non-stop since Matt walked in the door. She's excitable.

Boo,
Ace

Bizppl

2008-04-25T17:22:00.000-07:00

This is a word I just created. Why?

Because the word "entrepreneurs" is too long and frequently messes with my headline creation.

Bizppl: it's faster, gets the same point across.

Use it people, love it.

Ace

I stayed up till 2 a.m. playing Harvest Moon...

2008-04-06T09:12:00.000-07:00

And when I woke up, I immediately started plotting to sleep at my desk this morning.

I paid $4 in parking for this?

2008-04-03T17:49:00.000-07:00

Hellos.

Things that have happened lately:

-Mom got rear-ended yesterday. Didn't hurt her or her car though. Or me, since I was in it with her. But it was interesting.

-I/we settled on the Art Museum for the wedding location. And a date! April 24, 2009. Oh yeah, I know you're all excited. I'm sure it'll be swank.

-I'm graduating! I swear, this time. May 8. Sooo, the actual event is getting to be a crowded little thing, so if you haven't been invited yet, consider yourself banned. :D Kidding, about that, but I'm sure I'll have a post-actual-graduation-graduation-and-moving-celebration.

-Dude I just got a 74 on my second test? Suck it, Scarp. Well, to be fair, I did go to even less classes this semester. Meh, I'm still passing.

-I'm taking a trip to Atlanta next week! I'm so excited. I'll be gone Thursday through Wednesday. Oh, and as a corollary to the previous item, double suck it, Scarp.

-I still haven't finished my resume or cover letter. I think I'll do it ... one day. (Completely unwilling to name a date because then I'll just miss that.)

-I'm supposed to bake Marcia Carrot Cake Cookies, and I'm only doing it because it reminds me of the Penny Arcade comic about carrot cake soup. So I suppose that's my Saturday.

-Dudes, on my trip to Leahville, I got a speeding ticket, which is costing me $197. Suck it, Scarp! Aaaand the Texas Highway Patrol.

-Um... That's all I've got. Now, in narrative form:

Things are okay, thanks for asking. I'm enjoying a lot of my lovely blue sleeping pills lately. Last week I went to bed once at 6 p.m. But in case you're worried, I'm taking the right amounts! I just don't really feel like being awake anymore.

But I'm also getting a lot of family time in. Mostly with Dad, since Mom works nights. We all had an outing on Tuesday, to meet with the events coordinator at the Art Museum. Then for lunch at my favorite place, 1130. Which they both hated. But all I have to say to that is Suck it (Scarp), because I'm still doing my graduation thing there.

Things I need to do still:

-Finish cover letter and resume, send.
-Get graduation tickets.
-Get an extra present for Jenny's baby shower
-Pay ticket. Or not.
-Do this extra credit assignment, due Tuesday. (Remind me people, I did just get a C.)
-Pack stuff to take to Atlanta.
-Consider taking the cat.

Mmmm and that's all I have. I'll see you, mah pets.

Rachael

My brackets. Let me show you them.

2008-03-23T14:33:00.000-07:00

I'm not doing so hot in my tournament brackets competition. But, I have Kansas winning it all, GO JAYHAWKS, so all I need is that to come true to redeem myself.

Moving on.

I'm back in Arizona, peoples! I should call Cassie up this week, she wanted to hang over spring break. When I was clearly not available for hangings-out. But now I have scads of time on my hands. Scads. Piles...

So we could do something. You. Whomever is reading this. Keep me entertained and not thinking about my dismal future.

Okay, I was going for an optimistic post, but now I can't help thinking that I'm old. Like, 30? Not far away. And yes, I know it's exactly 8 years away, but come on. At least I'm almost 25, and then after that, I'll be 28, and THAT'S OLD. Or what I tell Matt, anyway.

Damn. And you know what? I'm going to have to pay my own cell phone bill at some point here. Probably in May. Daaaaamn. If that's not a grown up kinda thing, I don't even know what to say.

I'm bored, someone find me a quiz to take.

Alice

We're fine

2008-03-15T06:48:00.000-07:00

Just in case you saw the news this morning, we're fine. The storm didn't damage our place at all, and we had know idea about the tornado until this morning. But yes, we're near the damage. Call if you need us!

Rachael

Boxes and boxes

2008-03-07T18:01:00.000-08:00

Hi guys!

I am tired. So very very tired. The trip has been good, though. I'll give you a recap while I steal wireless internet from someone in my new complex.

We set out Tuesday morning at five. Luckily Matt let me sleep through the first shift of driving to San Antonio. That leg of the trip wasn't terrible, just a really long drive. I packed a whole bunch of food in the car, though, and we stopped for sandwiches and to switch drivers in El Paso, Texas, after about six hours or seven of driving. I had chosen to wear my shortest of gray shorts, my ASU shirt and knee socks for the drive, so I got some looks when we stopped. But I just figured I'm bringing Arizona style across the country.

With me driving, it took about one hour for me to get a speeding ticket. Sucks. I was doing 87 in an 80 mph zone. And according to our fine Texas Highway Patrolman, "Eighty is fast enough, ma'am." Sure, it was mostly bogus because everyone passing me was doing over 80, but I was raised with the law so I am incapable of arguing it.*

*Note, guys: I took that alignment quiz, too, and apparently I'm chaotic evil. Which, if I understand it correctly (and I'm marrying a complete dork that knows these things) is the most evil, being destructive and "demonic". Sorry. All I can say, though, is apparently revenge is a bad thing, and my lust for that and power lends me to ... the dark side. I'm not saying it's wrong, I was just shocked. Anyway, back to the story.

After my speeding ticket, we were stuck doing exactly 80 mph through vast swaths of Texas. We ended up being later than we thought to Leah and Raf's. We got there about 9 p.m. central time.

They had picked up an inflatable queen sized mattress, which was very generous, since it was also very very comfy. Though it's an investment in their visitors, so if anyone is swinging by San Antonio, there's good lodgings at the Rafaleah residence.

We had great chats, they got to meet Matthew Darling, and I think he was well received. I know he really liked them both, too, and said they were as cool as I always said.

Lots of chats, then sleeps, oh, and Moses! Skinny cat! lol!! Still loud, but he looked good. Plus he walks like he's still fat, sort of with his legs splayed. Funny.

The next morning, we had a tasty breakfast and pie, which is always awesome before noon. Then back home, were we played Wii Play on their new Wii. Really good time. Plus lots of great wedding tips.

Okay, okay, so good friends aside... we left Raf and Leah's place around 1 p.m. and headed to Houston. The drive was much shorter, about 4 and a half hours, because we hit the afterwork traffic downtown.

The Quattrini's (Dad's mum and pop) took us to the Kemah boardwalk for dinner at a very nice aquarium restaraunt. I had the best fish in mango sauce EVER. I'm still thinking about it. Seriously, it's like, I could continue eating that dinner for the rest of my life. Lol. Conversation was fun, too. It was actually really good to see both of them, and Matt was very charming and personable. They put us up very comfortably in a spare bedroom... and Virginia made us a fabulous breakfast the next morning. Plus Matt saw his first round of baby pictures...

The next morning we headed out for Silsbee Texas, where my other set of grandparents live. Grandma Marie, it was so good to see her. She's still tiny, and almost completely insane, but she sure charmed Matt. Grandma's always been really good at teasing me, so when she launched into telling us about her hot tub and trying to get me to test it out... Anyway, she's funny. Plus grandpa had great stories to tell Matt. Apparently he's from Missouri, where Matt when to college; and grandpa had served as a civilian contractor in Hawaii, when Mom was born there, around the same time Matt's Dad was in high school and his grandfather also serving as a civilian contractor on the same island. Very neat coincidences.

We saw my aunt, uncle, and two younger cousins. Ashley just had a baby, so I met my very first second cousin. It scared me, naturally, and Julie (my aunt) made me hold it. It was very very wierd. Then it started crying, which scared me so bad I started crying, and Matt took it, and it stopped. He's good with kids I guess.

We left that night, at 7 p.m., and started the drive to Atlanta. That was terrible. It rained and stormed the WHOLE way, across 4 states! We had a measly 30 minute break somewhere in Louisiana. Plus a scary hail storm too, but the car didn't seem to take any damage. It took us... about 13, 14 hours? Terrible. Terrible. LOL I can't say much more than that.

We finally got in about 8:30 this morning, signed the lease, met the movers, had the stuff moved in, then took a nap as best we could before starting to unpack. This part is fun though, because we're in our new place, and it's gorgeous. :D

As soon as I unpack my camera charger, I'll take good pictures of everything.

Now we're watching the first season of Lost on DVD and relaxing before we crash hard, tonight.

Kisses!

Ace

And I don't even like pancakes...

2008-02-27T09:06:00.001-08:00

New home :)

2008-02-24T18:58:00.000-08:00

Okay, the long awaited photos of our new home in Atlanta!

This is one of the buildings in our complex. It's pretty, and you can kinda see the mixed use aspect- some of the building is built over shops and restaurants. Not ours, though.

This is the courtyard, and a little bit of skyline so you can kinda tell it's downtown. Our building is the one in the middle, in the back, that's brick.

Front room! Pretty, original hardwood floors, cream colored walls, and a nice big front window with window seating. I'm very excited for that part.

The other side of the front room. Front door at the far right, coat closet with cute crystal doorknobs, and our decorative fireplace.

And you go through the front room to our dinning room, with its adorable built in cabinet. Left turn here takes you into the kitchen, or you walk straight through for the bedroom, bathroom and sunroom.

Future site of the action behind my dinner parties...

Bedroom, with the view of the door that goes to our sunroom. (soon to be Matt's Cave. I'm going to have to get him thick drapes.)

Sunroom! Pretty views. I'm still hoping I can teach my boy to love the sun... It's going to be such a waste.

....And the bathroom just to prove we have one.

Liked the tour?

Tired.

2008-02-19T20:43:00.000-08:00

This month is burning up. I'm almost out of February, and the stress is getting to me.

Mostly, like tonight, whenever something bad happens (I lose my keys and have a flat tire) I remember that everything else sucks at the same time. If you leave me alone for any extended period of time, I'll start crying and freaking out.

The good thing is I've only got three more weeks until stuff calms down again.

I've got a test that's due by 9 a.m., but I'm going to crash now. I'll write about Atlanta tomorrow when I'm feeling the optimism and energy again.

In between packing.

Nothing new or exciting to report.

2008-02-10T12:18:00.000-08:00

... other than I got engaged! OMGWTFBBQ!

Yeah, totes. Happened Tuesday at the zoo. Very cute, very romantic and especially just a perfect and fun day. I wasn't expecting it at all, I just thought we were hanging out before we had to work on election night! But it turns out everyone knew- he told Marcia as soon as he'd decided, asked Francesca to take me out Monday night so he can ask my Dad's permission, and met with my mom to obtain my lovely shiny grandmother Marie's ring.

We spent a normal day walking happily around the zoo, seeing all the parts that we'd missed during our last visit. And then we finished the trip off at the aviary, my favorite part, which was where he asked. (I have some pictures of these silly gray birds with yellow faces that watched Matt propose. I want to invite them to the wedding.)

Then afterward, and this was pretty cool, the new Sting Ray Bay exhibit is open, so I got to pet some rays! That was awesome!! You stick your hand in the water and the rays swim around and pet themselves with your hand. It's like what cats do, only underwater and slimey. It's a whole lot of fun.

After that, we got lunch (hamburgers, my pick, with a chocolate shake) and went to the ASU bookstore to pick up a media law guide for class, then a quick stop off at home, then we went to work. Where I saw this:

Chillin' on my monitor. Marcia wanted to let the ENTIRE newsroom know, just in case I had hoped to play it down. Beth was the first person to find out, though. I was so happy and out of it that I didn't really want to say anything, but when she came over to tell me about her weekend, she stopped and did the usual girl squeal thing. "Ohmygod WHAT is that on your hand????"

So plenty of people have found out by now, and everyone's happy for us. I've been trying to let everyone know in person or on the phone and I hope I haven't left anyone out. Well, Leah, I know I haven't called Leah. But I will.

It's great. I'm very happy and excited and in love. :)

So, down to brass-tax. The only downside has been Dad, so far. And you'd think, right? But here's what's up:

Dad is happy for us. He gave Matt his blessing (or rather, couldn't think of a single reason to object and didn't know what else to say). When I went home Wednesday night, both Mom and Dad were happy when I told them. But later on, Matt and I had idly started to look at places to hold a wedding, because people keep telling us you need to book that mess a year ahead of time. So I'm starting to realize how much this is going to cost, and me, not wanting anything left to uncertainty, went in to share what I'd learned with Dad. Dad freaked out, and told me that $25K is more than he will ever pay for a silly party. Except that the way he said it made it clear that there isn't a number he would have been happy with. If I'd come in and said, $10K he would have been upset.

So that sucked, a lot. Ended up with the usual Quattrini-style all out argument. Poor Matt!

Mom's on my side, naturally, and as long as it's reasonable I think she understands that weddings are expensive. As she told Dad during our all out argument, "You're going to be spending $25,000. Get used to it." So after that, I was depressed for a few days. I mean, my Dad doesn't want me to have a wedding! What a dick. But then again, Dad's a cheap bastard so he's probably just dealing with sticker shock. So passing into my third state of emotion on this, which we'll call "resentment", I'm now after my damn movie check, as it's called. He's going to pay and he's going to like it, and that's what he gets for making me sad. Badam!

So that's where all that stuff's at. I'm looking at places, I have some ideas, we'll chat more.

But right now, I'm running out of February to enjoy with Matt before we ship him off to Atlanta, and that's all I care about.

See you, everybody!

the Engaged McShank

Exactly one week later

2008-01-21T09:02:00.000-08:00

Hi.

If this were a posting-off, I'm kicking Esther's ass. I've had three this month. Anyway.

I'm stuck at work today, on the federal holiday everyone forgets is a holiday. It's really busy because of it. But I'll manage, since I intend to do nothing besides blog, mess around on the internet and some homework.

So, let's start it off with big, horrible news:

Matt got the Atlanta job.

Yep.

In other news, I picked up Cooking Mama for the DS. It's pretty cool. I'm excellent at making boiled rice so far. It's a game of mini games, where you use the touch screen to complete the steps of the recipe. To chop, to mix, to fry, to crack eggs... I'm enjoying because you can play in short bursts.

Also, I chopped all my hair of on Tuesday. It's shorter than it has ever been. If I can take a good picture, I'll share.

Well, that's all the off topic subjects I can think of. I wish I had more, but now I'm left with only ATL to talk about, so heres-we-go.

Atlanta. This is going to suck.

Well, I guess that's being negative. I told Esther yesterday, she was the first person I saw (online) to tell. I didn't even tell Dad, I let Matt handle that. And I sent mom a painting about it.

So, the details are, it's not the original job Matt was after. It turns out after his interview, they created another job, just for him. And this job also turns out to be much cooler than we expected. So it's a big pay increase, a cooler job, he gets a shiny new laptop, 401K and a pension, three weeks of vacation, and the start date is March 10. It's the farthest he could push it back. They're also going to fly Matt and I out and put us up while he looks for a new place to live.

So in May, I'll head out there. For unknowness. No friends, no job yet, and as the ugly girl in Pride and Predjudice says, "I've no money and no prospects!"

Dad's happy with it. Not happy, excited to have me gone, but he's happy and sees it as a step forward in life. He's promised to come to visit all the time. Mom has promised she's going to chain me up in my bedroom as soon as I come home.

I'm a teeny tiny bit excited too. We're going to try to get a two bedroom place, so we can have visitors if anyone's in the area. Now, I know none of my friends have any reason to be in the area, but maybe one day you'll want to have a little vacation. Other than that, I'm going to visit Texas on the way to Atlanta, since I'll have to drive my car, to see the grandparents I love and can't make it up for my graduation, and hopefully to see Leah for a bit too, before I'm banished to the East Coast. But I'll be home a lot, I imagine, since both my family and Matt's are here. Probably in November for Thanksgiving, not Christmas this year, though, because Jeff's getting married in North Dakota. And I'll try to plan layovers whenever I travel, which will include trips to California (probably) for Coachella this year and to Seattle for PAX.

So as I told Esther, I don't have a smiley face for how I feel- happy, scared, ready to vomit and scream and excited and scared. It would look something like
/X-S + (vomit).

Visiting Strawberry

2008-01-14T21:18:00.000-08:00

My fans, I had a most lovely weekend, jam-packed with recreation. Thanks of course to Lovely Beth, who was nice enough to work for me so I could enjoy my last hurrah before school started again. Today. Lame. Okay, onto the blow by blow, with pictures.

Friday- Work, followed by quality recreation time with Meg and Mike. Matt and I took Meg and Mike to Golfland in Mesa for mini golf. I had a great time. Now, I've blogged before about my golfing skills, which don't allow points for the creativity I display. But all that aside, I got three hole in ones, and an almost hole in one, where I initially hit the ball so hard it bounced off the wall and into the river, (which Matt fished out of the water, with me saying, "Fetch, boy, this is why girls bring boys to mini golf," He's so compliant.) but got a perfect hole in one on my second attempt.

I also managed to make Matt scream, which was fun. Meg had sent her yellow ball into the "rough" (the landscaping), and Matt found a frog while looking for it. Matt pointed out the frog to me, and said, "You can catch it if you want," then turned and kept looking. So, I caught it. Then walked up to him with the frog in my hand, stuck it in his face and said, "Look, Frog!" Matt screamed. Apparently, he didn't think I'd actually catch the frog. Or try to scare him with it. And if I'm good at anything, I know catching frogs and scaring Matt are high on my list of skills.

Matt won mini-golf, Mike in second with Meg and I tying with the same score in double-last. We played some DDR in the arcade and had a late dinner at Denny's to round out the evening.

On Saturday, Matt and I drove up to Flagstaff. It wasn't snowing, but there had been a storm earlier in the week, so there was plenty of snow to play with. We forgot to bring a working camera, and so on Sunday I replaced my old small camera with a shiny new red one. I like.

Anyway, snow was fun! We drove up to a play area, had snowball fights and snow fights and Matt made a snow angle and we attempted a snowman - which, as everyone present for last year's snowperson creation, can be quite hard. We achieved a similar shape but gave up in the end, too. The day was sunny and perfect and lovely- there were lots of families out playing, too, so it made the scene extra cheerful.

On Sunday, we were lazy in the hotel until check out time, the drove out to Williams to visit the Grand Canyon Deer Farm. For deer. And petting them. Oh, that was so much fun!! Animals we saw included a monkey of some sort, caribou, llamas and a camel. Yeah, a camel in the snow is about as awesome as it sounds. Pics!

After the Deer farm, we headed back down the 17. Only I had mentioned that I really wanted to visit and maybe get lunch in Strawberry, Arizona. Which I remembered being not that far off the 17. And which on the map, looked not that far.

Well, as it turns out I was hella wrong. It was like 30 miles out of the way, but Matt took us anyway, all extra cheerful. And it was totally worth it. While the town of Strawberry is only like, 8 buildings, it had an adorable lodge where we had burgers and pie and watched some football with native Strawberrians.

It was a blast.

We headed home after that, making it back into Phoenix in time to hit up a nice restaraunt in the Chinese Cultural Center for Jeff's 25th birthday.

Also, as a back story, I spent the entire weekend trying to sneak in a hair cut, but couldn't quite manage. This tangled mess will be removed tomorrow, so help me --- !!!

Feliz 2008!

2008-01-06T09:42:00.000-08:00

Good morning! It's time for the very special, very first post of 2008!

Happy new years to all my readers. I hope your events and activities were all lovely. For New Year's, I went to friend Shawn and Carla's home for their New Years Party/Bad Movie Night. Great times, had by all. We watched Battle Royale and Black Sheep. Both are horrible, horrible films. I liked the sheep one though.

Anyway, revelry was had. We spent New Years Day mostly in bed- starting with the Mizzou game (Go Tigers!) and then for Mass Effect. We had dinner with Matt's parents and visited mine afterwards.

(Jeez, I hope that happened, I'm having trouble remembering just right now. Not that that means anything... No alcohol, just bad memory.)

I didn't post about Christmas, either, did I? Well, that was lovely too. We split it up- we had Christmas with Matt's family the Saturday before and were with my parents on Christmas morning. Also very lovely. I got a Wii, and extra remotes so I have three now. And Wii Play and Super Mario Galaxy and a Donkey Kong racer game. So lovely times will be had with that. Oh, and excitement (for pretty much just me and Esther) the new Harvest Moon console game comes out soon for the Wii. Harvest Heroes. I'm very excited. Matt reminded me about that on Friday, to which I said, "This is the single most exciting event in my LIFE." I might be overstating some, but who isn't excited to water plants by tilting the Wii mote? It's like you're actually farming!!! (That was a joke.)

So there's that. Oh, Matt got me a really cool painting for Christmas. Not got, like went to the store, but had our artist friend Meg do one of me, riding a dinosaur. It's really freaking cool. And not to mention, it looks like me, which is very weird. I've never been in a painting before. Gah!!! :D I'll try to remember to scan it when I'm home next, I promised some people I'd bring a picture in anyway. Very, very cool.

So that was Christmas!

Oh, some other news- Matt didn't get the Atlanta job. The whole thing was very strange. It sounded like the AJC wanted both candidates, and created a second job that would mostly do online databases. They really wanted Matt to take that job, which he naturally turned down. It's essentially what his intern (the Lovely F!) does here. Lame. By a lot. So we passed on that, and in an effort to be nice to them anyway, Matt suggested they find some kid out of college to do that for them.

Fast forward a few days- I'm checking my school email, where I get letters about internship opportunities. The very last one happens to be the exact job they offered Matt. Hi-larious.

Add another layer to it, as I'm considering applying. I could like it. :D

So that's that, but that doesn't mean he's out of options. Now there's a new opening that someone called him about- Director of Databases at the journalism organization, NICAR (National Institute for Computer-Aided Reporting). That would be in Columbia, Missouri. Matt's college stomping ground, of sorts. It's sort of a small town, and Matt never really had plans to go back, but with a word like Director in the job title, there's money involved. It freaked Matt out at first, because it's the sort of job he'd imagined getting when he was burned out from working at a paper. And it seems early when he's just a fresh and (relatively) young 28-year-old.

Haaaa, I jest- he's old.

So there's that happening. Not to mention he's using the rocket sauce he's got lately to get a raise. I mean, boy's not even job hunting and every paper (and their mother's paper) wants him.

It must be nice to be a stud.

Anyway, things are less optimistic for me. Or, well, maybe I'm just less optimistic. My editors are trying to get me to get where they can consider me for a reporting job here. That means more clips and hard news, essentially. I'm not very optimistic, but I'm still going to work hard just to see if it works out. If not, I'm just building experience for Atlanta or whoever wants to hire me next.

Mum and Dad are good. Nothing new there. Oh, I heard David broke up with his girl, Ashley. Was it Ashley? She worked at Ashley's anyway. Whatsherface. They're done.

Oh, exciting things this month:

-Classes start soon. Most of mine are online, so I get to spend more time at my favorite place in the whole world- my desk. At the office.
-I have an advising appointment Jan. 15. Musn't forget that.
-Ed team meeting next week, Jan. 9.
-Jefferey's birthday is Jan. 12. It's not really exciting at all for me, but whatever.
-Special showing of a new collection at the art museum on Jan. 19. I need to order my tickets for that too.
-I'm planning on heading to Flagstaff for the weekend of Jan. 25-27. Could be just one day, but I have the weekend off and if my snow dances have worked, I'll have nice powdery snowy softness to play in.
-Sappy anniversary on the 29th. Eeeew.
-Beth Darling's birthday is Feb. 2. Again, not exciting for me, but that means I have to work. Happily so, no sarcasm there.
-My birthday!!!! All POTATOES!!! I'm so psyched for dinner.

Okay, I'm done. See you!

Or, The Whale

2007-12-16T12:50:00.000-08:00

It's a band.

I've spent most of the morning working on a Christmas list for Mum. And then a secondary list for Mum, of Matt-acceptable presents. Jeeez. I really just wish I'd brought my DS to work today, then I could have given up on this ages ago.

Finals are over! It's great. Really. I'll check my grades at the end of December. They're probably posted now, but I hate looking for things when I know it's only bad news. Well, that it could be bad news. I'm sure I did fine though.

I went to Jenny's graduation yesterday at ASU West. It was nice, but it did remind me that I'm due for one in May. (Unless I can avoid it, mwa ha ha ha). I'll have a shiny new J-degree and no job or prospects. It's great to be a slacker.

Oh, readers, my darlings- Christmas party. It's Wednesday, December 19. According to my calendar, that's also the day that Marcia comes home from her vacation. But I digress. Yes, we must assemble and be cheerful that night. I need to get ahold of Cassie. I'll send her a myspace message later, and text her when I find my phone.

The phone isn't actually lost right now, it's just somewhere that's not in my pocket. I imagine that means by blue purse. I'll investigate later tonight.

Now I'll never be as happy

2007-12-10T10:30:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone!

I just got back from Disneyland. I feel like I can never be as happy as I was on Thursday and Friday. Like, my lifetime happiness has peaked. Wedding day? Sorry, Matt, I'll only be almost as happy. Birth of children? Sorry, FutureKids, you're not as much fun either.

It was my first visit since I was a baby, meaning I remembered almost nothing. The only memory I had of my first visit was that David and I liked the Roger Rabbit ride in ToonTown.

My favorite part might have been how pretty everything is. It's sparkling clean (which is an accomplishment for a park with thousands of visitors every day), Main Street is gorgeous, oh, and it's all light up for Christmas! Giant trees in Disneyland and California Adventure, wreaths and lights and snow and and and...

Pretty.

I'll post some pictures, since a lot of them came out nice.

My favorite rides were Space Mountain, the Ferris Wheel at the California Adventure, the Indiana Jones ride and the teacups. Well, hanging around the Alice area in Fantasy Land was great, with the "Very Merry Unbirthday" song pipping around. Except, on Friday, which actually was Matt's birthday. :D Adorable. Although, I'm still slightly annoyed that Alice doesn't get invited to the Princess party, and there's very little merch for her. Poor Alice...

Me, in front of a classic Alice poster. :)

I mentioned pretty Christmas trees. This is the one at the California adventure.

Aaand, we met Mickey, and Matt finally got the answer to our debate. I'm right, naturally. Is Mickey married to Miney? Mickey said no ring, no marriage.

So on rainy Friday morning, we were in line for California Screamin', which is the California Adventures' big roller coaster. Scary fast, has loops. I was very very nervous, and at the very last minute, they STOPPED the ride because of technical diffuculties. Meanining, they rolled the coasters back in and freezed the ones already on the track. They made everyone get out of line, and it was out of commision for a few hours. So, to burn off my nervous energy, I made Matt ride the carosel. On an otter. :D

And for Matt's birthday, we had dinner at the Blue Bayou, the really nice restaraunt IN the Pirates of the Carribean ride. It was really really really really nice. And expensive. :D And the best part of that story would be how MATT CRIED to get us in. :D okay, lemme explain. See, Matt really wanted to eat there during our trip. He's a Disneyland veteran, and he's seen the people up at the Blue Bayou having dinner from the Pirates ride lots of times, and as a kid, thought it was so cool that only really important people were allowed to eat there. So on Thursday, our first night at the park, we headed over and tried to get in at 7 p.m. The hostess told us there were already booked for the night. So we decided to make a reservation earlier on Friday, Matt's birthday. We finished up with the entire California Adventure park by 3 p.m. on Friday, and headed straight to the Blue Bayou, and told them we wanted to make a reservation for tonight. The hotess: "Sorry, but we're booked through Sunday night. Your best bet is trying to get a walk up table some time tonight." (Meaning, of course, no dice.) Matt, looks at me, looks at the hostess, and I start to see his eyes getting wattery, and he goes, "But it's my birthday..." in the saddest voice ever. The hostess immediately goes, let me see what I can do, and starts whispering to her co-hostess, and then comes back and says, we can fit you in right now if that's okay. Matt brightens up, and they take us right back for dinner. So, as he's quick to point out, he didn't actually cry, but the boy has a devastating puppy dog look, and it's just not right to use that on ladies.

That's some of my stories. I have lots. :D

See you!

-A

Beowulf Madlibs

2007-11-26T21:40:00.001-08:00

I've just returned from the theater. Just, you know, FYI, if you were expecting Beowulf to be cool, prepare for disappointment. Then again, if you are like me, and went expecting Angelina Jolie boobies, expect to be pleasantly amused. It's a nice set, but it's also CGI knockers. The ol' bait and switch. There's also gender equality in the nudity, with plenty of Beowulf nakedness too.

I decided I hated it about ... 15 minutes into it, with the line that everyone's heard by now: "I am Beowulf! I am here to kill your monster." My first thought, after that, was: "I am Beowulf! I am here to wax your floors." Now, I can't really explain why my mind first goes to floor wax, but there you go. I figure if you announce your presence with that kind of conviction, you'll have success at whatever you do.

If you go, here's the best things to watch for:
-John Malkovich beating a cripple
-Golden boobies
-Learning what a bed warmer is, and why you should want one
-Watching what is definetly the Queen from Shrek being reanimated in another movie.

That's all I've got.

I'm making cocoa, and right now, deciding if I should go to bed, stay up for some homework, or collect some more Pokemons.

I'm thinking I need to catch them all.

-A

FuturePig

2007-11-25T15:53:00.000-08:00

Hello.

I have six minutes to post, because that's when I get to leave work. And I'm excited for that moment, folks.

FuturePig happens to be the name of my future pet pig. He's a brown and white pig, and together, we will explore the outer reaches of space. I'll post a picture of FuturePig later tonight, because I know you're all also desperate to meet my time-and-space traveling friend.

FuturePig happened earlier this morning while searching for apartments in Atlanta. Turns out, there's this one cute place that specifically prohibits pot-bellied pigs as an acceptable breed of pet.

I was crushed.

I really liked this place, you know? Nice courtyard, with flowers and a pretty orange and brick front. So I told Matthew Dearest, Sorry, but the Pig and I will have to visit you, because I can't abandon my Space Friend.

I have a picture of that, too.

Matt: "If he's FuturePig, shouldn't he live in space? Would we need to house him at our place in Atlanta?"
Me: "Out of the question, I am FuturePig's extra cute sidekick. Ace McShank, Space Adventurist."

(I don't have a picture of my business card yet, but I'm thinking I will, eventually.)

Matt's Big, Scary Interview happens Friday. Shhh, don't tell anyone. I guess it's okay that you know. Since you just read that. But don't tell anyone else.

The outcome will inevitably be Good/Bad. Because, if he gets the job, Yaaaaaaayyy.... but then he moves to Atlanta. And then I have to move. Boooo.. Or there's the reverse, Awwwww, you didn't get the job, but, yaaaay we get to stay here until I graduate.

Looks like the only thing keeping my spirits up is the FuturePig.

I have achieved Christmas presents for ... 3/5 of my readership. I bid you adieu.

-A

Hello, telephone. Who are you pretending to be this time?

2007-11-11T10:44:00.000-08:00

I've been browsing worryfriends.com this morning. It's good for a giggle. Personally, I'm excited to start miming asterisks with my fingers to emphasize certain words in my conversations.

Mum and Dad have been cruising all this week. Some place, in an ocean, near Mexico. I haven't gotten a call once, so naturally, I've started to assume they've been murdered by pirates and now must soldier through life an orphan.

Really, I've spent the week caring for Dinah, Miss Ma'am, China, Zucchini, Matt and Pepper. None have been too much trouble. Zucchini has been way less annoying than Pepper, even.

Matt's got tonsillitis (which would be the Itis not associated with greasy bacon-peas) , compacted ear wax, and maaaaaaybe mono. Which means the poor boy has been sick all week. I've been doing my best impersonation of a caring girlfriend, and I think so far he's buying it.

I've also been cooking all this week. I'm kinda proud of myself. I made a nice dinner on Tuesday night, which I brought to Matt at work. (He had to work late because it was election night.) I made lemon-sage chicken with buttery saucepan carrots*, grilled zucchini and garlic bread. *I burnt the EF out of the carrots. I managed to charcol all the bottoms by following that "if I turn the heat up twice as high, it'll cook twice as fast" train of thought. Strangely, though, the carrots were still tasty. Even the charcoled ends weren't bad, but I wouldn't blame a soul for throwing that part out. Matt said overall, it's the best chicken he's ever had, including restaurant kind, and he fed the leftovers to a coworker who said equally kind things.

Wednesday Matt was feeling extra sick, so I made him grilled cheese and made some mac and cheese for Marcia. And me. Cause I love mac and cheese. (And now, I have a whole dish of it in my fridge I better start eating...)

Thursday I had Rachel and E over (thanks for coming, guys!) and I made Chicken sauteed in cheese and milk, Greasy Bacon Peas, boiled potatoes and more garlic bread. That was fun, too, but my favorite part was the potatoes, since I love potatoes. Mmmm...

(After dinner, we played Guitar Hero 3. I had a good night. :)

Friday Matt was extra sick again, so I wimped out and made myself tuna salad sandwich.

Saturday I made beef stew! Again, proud of this one, even though I nearly ruined it. See, I was supposed to be browning the onions with the beef cubes, when I got distracted by cleaning the kitties water dish. So when I turned back, I had charcoled most of the onions and burnt some of the meat. That turned into a serious pout. I wanted to throw it all away, but Matt stopped me. (I'm a quitter, what can I say?) Anyway, he said very nice things, bolstered my confidence some, and I ended up finishing it after all. And it too, turned out tasty. :D You could barely taste the charoly onions.

Today, Matt made pancakes for breakfast. From the pancake mix that can only be described as pancakes for idiots. No reflection on his breakfast-making skills at all, they were quite tasty. For lunch, stuck at work, I have a salad I made for myself earlier this week, and I'll likely have leftovers, all lonesome at dinner time.

So those are my cooking adventures for this week! Seriously, it's been a lot of fun, because I get surprised and happy when I cook something and it doesn't suck. It's great.

Just think of it as practice for my 2008 All-Potato Bash (otherwise known as my 22nd birthday, happening in February.)

Now, I've got two stories to write at work, get some questions together for an interview on Monday, and get through some homework. Oh, and see if there's anything new and exciting from the mail lately. :D

See you!

A

The LeBouef in hot water

2007-11-05T16:11:00.000-08:00

I'm just going to say, it's important that we all pay attention to this. Really.

Moving along.

I just got a gentle reminder from a friend to post about my new fair friends. I sent a few pics out from the state fair, of animals I met in the petting zoo.

New friends!

It's an alpaca.

AAaaaaaand a goat. I <3 goats.

Mmkay. So, I went on Friday last week. It was a blast, considering I got to take a half-day to do it. My boss sent me off with a cheerful, "Eat a fried twinkie for me!"

I went with:

My lover, F (yes, that's her nickname, I'm not keeping her identity secret) and lovely boyfriend Matt, who is now rocking the lack o' stache.

We, clearly, are in love:

Anyway, it was fun. I had a ridiculously good time by 7 p.m., and that was before the demolition derby. Yes, cars were smashed. Things set ablaze. Bits of sharp metal flying in the air. I won a dog, by beating F, Matt, Neil and Alex in a water gun game. Woooot...

Well, there's pictures. Maybe I'll blog more tonight, but right now I'm pretty much flagrantly not paying attention. My boy presented in class, so I payed attention during that, but at this point, I'm done. Blarrrrrgh...

A

Hold the presses!

2007-10-21T10:23:00.000-07:00

I forgot something.

I bought myself a headset so I can smack talk while I get killed at Halo 3. And Matt bought me Viva Pinata! :D :D :D

It's so freaking cute and entertaining. We played a garden last night, and let me tell you, this thing is actually quite intense. Every 30 seconds there trying to teach you something new to do, meanwhile, I'm still trying to get my shovel out to whack some pinatas that keep fighting.

So, you find a pinata couple, make them happy by meeting some criteria, then get them to mate. Seriously. The game calls it a "romance dance!" IT's so creepy and funny at the same time.

And you can beat the pinatas until they die, and then they explode into candy and confetti. Which the other pinatas eat. It makes them happier.

And and and...

It's just great. I can't wait to play more.

Hasta la.

When it hurts to sneeze...

2007-10-21T09:53:00.000-07:00

So, long time, no content-filled post goodness. This I shall try to fix.

I guess the biggest thing on my mind has been my back. I hurt it about three weeks ago, and ever since, bending forward or backward hurts. A lot. And sneezing makes me scream. It sucks. So there's me, who hates the doctor anyway, trying to put up with it as long as I could. I even got those bengay patches! When I got frustrated with the nearly constant pain and having to get help and moving around like an old lady, I made an appointment for Wednesday this week with the doctor and took an extra day off work for it.

So I limped through Monday, and spent Tuesday running errands with mom. She's looking for new clothes for her upcoming cruise. I don't mind helping, except mom is really very picky. And she's a lot like me in that she doesn't really like people clothes shopping with her. But I made the best out of it, and we had a good time. I got a new purse, a stuffed dino for my car, some flip flops... It was fun. I don't get a whole lot of quality time with my mom, for two reasons: our schedules don't blend perfectly, and if there's a choice between me and my dad, she'd mostly rather hang out with him. I'm okay with that.

So on the way home, about 4:30, I get a call from the doctor's office, saying they can't find records of my insurance. They end up calling Cigna, my dad's insurer, and find out that I got kicked of the insurance last month because I didn't submit a school schedule showing I'm a full-time student.

That sucked, especially noting that I'm not a full time student, and there's really no way to fix this problem until next semester. So I better stay healthy, damnit! Meanwhile, all my pills are going to be more expensive...

I tried to get out of going, but mom insisted I go to the doctor anyway and just pay the difference. Apparently she was tried of hearing my sneeze-screams. Which sound something like, "aach-AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

I spent Tuesday night doing laundry and watching a few episodes of The Office.

Wednesday morning, bright and early, went to the doctor for my back. He perscribed me some muscle relaxers for bedtime, so I can sleep without pain (lies, btw) and some anti-inflammatory. I like those much better.

So, the muscle relaxers just tranquilize me. The first time I took one, I slept ridiculously hard and it took Matt a while to get me out of bed and off to school. It feels like I took a lot of sleeping pills, really. That same sort of breathing-is-special feeling I've mentioned before. So they knock me out pretty well, but it still hurts in the middle of the night.

The anti-inflammatory do make me feel better, though. Course, I'm supposed to be taking them with food, and taking them at morning and night, and what two meals does Alice normally love to skip? That's right, breakfast and dinner. Lame.

I've been taking my pills and it comes and it goes. Sometimes I wake up and it's still excruciating, and sometimes I feel mostly okay, except when I sneeze (like this morning.)

That's that. What's next?

My friend Amanda moved away, about a month ago. I miss her. :(

Oh, we're having a tailgating party Saturday at the ASU-CAL game, if anyone wants to come. Email me. I guess I need to send invites today, I'll see if I can do that.

Oh, oh. I went to The Nest, the haunted attraction at Schnepf's Farm in Queen Creek. It's kinda like a smaller Fear Farm. We went with F the intern and her brother and friends. But there was fireworks! Really nice... and I saw my first shooting star. Which was weird. I wanted someone else to see it to confirm I'm not crazy, but no one else did. Anyway, I spent a lot of time comparing it to Fear Farm in my head and telling stories about the stuff Rachel pulls when she goes. Like licking the severed foot. And the rave dance party. :D

And, que mas... I'm so psyched for the Fair. I can't wait to go. I'm going on Halloween, right after work, it's going to be epic. The fair still has petting zoos, right? I'll have to do that part first so I don't miss out on goat-fun. I<3goats.

ASU football had a bye week this week (didn't play) so Matt and I went to Jilly's in Ahwatukee to watch the Mizzou game. Mizzou won, go tigers. ASU this week moves to #8 in the USA Today poll, but that's the only one out so far this morning. Go devils, go devils.

That's all I've got, mostly. I need to try harder at work and school, fix my back, plan the tailgating party, do some laundry and clean tonight, say hi to Dad who's been hunting all this week.

Oh, and next week at some point we're having/going to dinner for David's birthday. I'm going to go. And be nice. But I'm taking Matt with me, too, damnit. He'll be a positive influence on my niceness.

OH, gosh, I should blog about my cousin. Whattawhore. OMG, lol.

My 18 year old cousin, just out of high school, is seven months pregnant, and now happily shotgun married to her idiotic impregnanting boyfriend, and the happy couple lives with his parents in a trailer park. Oh, and did I mention that Ashley has no job, neither does her husband, and neither are going to college?

That's the fast-track to the American Dream, people.

Okay, that's all I got. Leave some comments, people.

Everything I want comes in a rocket can!

2007-10-13T10:33:00.001-07:00

I love pinatas...

2007-09-16T16:56:00.001-07:00

Will you marry me, Rudy Burgess?

2007-09-09T09:06:00.000-07:00

I now have two sports.

I'm excited; it's kind of a big thing for me. Going from having NO sports to two whole sports, it's a big change.

So far, my sports are baseball and football.

And by "my," I mean I can watch and understand nearly everything going on. And I have a favorite team and player.

Last night, after I'd bid Dad adieu (bedtime, 8:30) I tried to find the rest of the Diamondbacks game that I had been listening to on the radio on TV. It wasn't there, because of football. So I flipped through my sports channels, deciding to either watch football or just read in bed. FSN had ASU's game on, so I though, whatthahell. I even texted M, "I'm going to watch ASU lose this game."

(I'm a hater. Note blog title.)

So I settled in, at the beginning of the second quarter, with ASU trailing Colorado. Only, ASU didn't lose. The scored a cool touch down right off the bat, and kept going. It was actually kind of exciting to watch.

The best part is, last night's game was terrible, according to all the analysis. But it really couldn't have been better for me at all.

See, apparently ASU was playing like ass. Meaning, they were kicking the shit out of Colorado and scoring penalties left and right. (Non-footballers: Penalties are a bad thing.) I literally watched an ASU guy clothesline someone. It was sick. I was giggling like a crazy person. Clotheslines? So obviously against the rules. But this dude (and I don't remember the number, or he'd be my campus hero) runs at the Colorado player, sticks his arm out, and whacks him in the throat, knocking him to the ground. Great stuff, really.

There was some helmet grabbing, some pushing, some interesting tackles and then some more touchdowns for ASU. And then my favorite play of the night:

ASU, in the fourth quarter on like, 4th and 10, has to punt. (Meaning, I think, have to give the ball back to the other team anyway, so they take the opportunity to kick it as far down field as they can to make it difficult for them) There's the kick. Goes something like 48 yards. There's a Colorado player, looking up hopefully, all ready to receive the punt/ball/whatever-you-call-this-type-of-play , then, then! ASU player #3 (forever immortalized in my heart) comes out of nowhere and takes a flying jump into this kid's stomach. They land in a pile near the end zone, and the ball plops onto the ground where Colorado Boy used to be.

Then, the announcers:

"Oh, that is so illegal."
"Number 3 should really know better than that."
"What was he thinking?"
"There's no way that's not interference with his catch."

And me, realizing that that tackle was not, in fact fair and awesome, it was unfair, wrong, against the rules, flagrant, bad and naughty, and yes, still awesome.

An open letter to the Sun Devils:

Dear Sun Devils-

Congratulations on winning the game last night. Don't let the press get you down. You fought dirty, and still won? I say that's an excellent strategy right there. Five personal fouls and 136 penalty yards seems like the ground floor to me. If you need some encouragement, I'll host WWE Raw night at my place. We'll tell Dennis Erickson we're all studying. I'll bake something.

Rudy Carpenter? You're nuts. But if I have to hear the color commentary from the FSN people tell me that one more time, I'm going to stab someone. It's enough to see you take the field rocking half a shirt (left side, long sleeves, right side, no sleeves!) and to watch you pound your head on the field when your teammates can't your throws, and to watch you pout when things aren't going your way to know this. I don't know if you were the right choice for the Sun Devils with the whole too-many-quarterbacks-in-the-kitchen debate from last year, but I do know you're the right choice to get Ace McShank a watchin'.

Rudy Burgess? I love you. That illegal tackle was stellar. Thank you for making football awesome.

I'll see you boys next Saturday.

Love,

Alice

P.s., the Dbacks won, too. Woot!

Reaching into the future...

2007-08-31T16:49:00.000-07:00

I now present to you, the names of my future pets:

Marcia, my cat.

Spice, the parrotlet

Koro, the dog

The Senator, and his Aide. (Goldfish)

S. Cotton, the sheep.

Rachel, the bearcat.

*Note: I will not necessarily have all these animals, but I thought naming them ahead of time was a good idea.

I is in ur blogospherez...

2007-08-30T23:03:00.000-07:00

... postin' mai lifes.

Okay, all LOLcats aside, I'm blogging it UP. All over the place. You've gots your work blogs, your personal blogs, and your school blogs.

It's almost starting to seem like I like talking about myself...

Anyway, Matt properly reinspired me for my work blog today. What did he say? (Google Be Praised.) Oh yeah:

Waffles: Looking forward to more Rachael Q blogs at AZcentral
says the guy who can't get around to updating either of his web sites

me: Are you saying you are
?
Waffles: I am looking forward to more, yes.
me: Why?
You know what happens better than anyone.
You could almost write it.
Waffles: Cause... it's cool to see you writing for the Republic
or speaking for students for the Republic.
I like to read what you write.
me: I'll try to get to it today.

That's right, folks. I'm speaking for students. I am a VOICE. Feel the power...

So my goal is four times a week. Keep checking back! (In all seriousness, please. I need readers!)

The school blog isn't bad. It comes at the behest of my Favorite Professor of the Semester, American League. (That's a nickname, obv. And he never needs to know this.) We're to blog, two times a week, about an assigned media website.

And how much do I rock that Andrew gave me Slate.com? Seriously, he even gave it to me hesitently, saying if I had a better site, I could make an arguement. But I don't. I love Slate, in all seriousness. If you need to be convinced, check out this edition of the Explainer. Secret naughty bathroom sex codes? Consider them explained.

So, I'm looking forward to that.

Que mas, que mas?

I'm watching my beloved play Bioshock. Which, to be perfectly clear, is creepy as hell. He's got it turned up, too, so every now and then I hear refrains of music from the 40's, eerie voice rambling pseudo socialist proganda, and gun shots. The graphics are stellar, though, on the Xbox 360 he obtained this week.

Seriously, I could start a blog up about his life. I'll call it, Vicarious Life of a Beta Male. Or, Observations on a Life of a Beta Male. Report from the Natural Habitat of a Beta Male.

Oh, I'll share a snippet of a game we played this afternoon:

me: "Does he go by reporter?"
Waffles: tell him Data Reporter
Matt Dempsey, data reporter
4:29 PM Johnny Waffles, ass kicker
me: Matt Dempsey, Data Master.
Waffles: Master of All Data
Ace McShank, bitch smacker
me: Matt Dempsey, Excel Wizard
Waffles: Pretty much anything rocks after that comma
Matt Dempsey, Professional Kitten Petter
4:30 PM Matt Dempsey, Web Surfer.
Ace McShank, Farmer
me: LOL
Waffles: Ace McShank, Artificial Pet Owner
4:31 PM me: Ace McShank, Smiter.
Waffles: lol
This is like my word game I think
me: Yes.
Waffles: consistently and eternally funny
and amusing
and entertaining
4:32 PM me: Johnny Waffles, Goldfish masseuse
Johnny Waffles, Left Shoe Purchaser
Waffles: Goldfish Masseuse!!!
That killed me
4:33 PM <--- is trying hard not to be a spectacle of laughter on 8
me: Matt Dempsey, Number Cruncher
Ace McShank, Nearly Professional Blogger
4:35 PM Waffles: True
true
you are a professional blogger
if you actually blog for AZcentral that is
Matt Dempsey, Cruncher of Numbers
4:37 PM me: Matt Dempsey, Purveyor of Fine Car Smells
4:38 PM Waffles: Clearly
Rachael Quattrini, Cleaning Expert

That made me giggle.

We took Marcia T, Good Friend, to the Apple Store and dinner tonight. She purchased a new white Macbook, printer, and 20 gig iPod. All for about $1,600. With a $300 rebate for the printer. A good haul. Marcia, ever hesitant and ready to change her mind, even said she was feeling "kinda good" with the purchase, at dinner.

Really, in the bathroom, at dinner.

And this, really, should not be shared, but Marcia is the only person in the world that I pee with. Really. We make trips out of it, and usually use the bathroom bonding time to make horrible jokes and update gossip from the last few hours. We call it "racing".

And that's enough of that.

Really, I'm rambling a bit, but feeling accomplished that I put up a school post and a work post this evening, so I'll just kill it here and, hopefully, be back in the action tommorrow.

I have to try to see if I can get my boy to come to bed now.

Signing off,

Ace McShank, Nearly Proffessional Blogger.

Exciting developments!

2007-08-20T16:16:00.000-07:00

Today is the first day of classes.

And, and and! Rolling out my shiny new work blog:

http://www.azcentral.com/members/Blog/18409/

Check it, my hommies. Leave me comments. Be excited. Tell your friends. Don't spoil my secret identity.

I'll post more about my first day of school, but so far, so good. I took the shuttle from the downtown campus (one block west of my work garage) to campus, and it was quite speedy. I'll be doing that from now on. Saves me parking tickets, I can tell you that right now.

K, thats all I've got, thks fr th mmrs.

Alice

Extravagant toenails

2007-08-15T23:07:00.000-07:00

I just spent about an hour giving myself a very interesting pedicure. Orange and yellow toes, alternating, with polka dots.

Shhhhi....

I was just admiring, and I noticed a mistake. Dang. I'll have to redo it again soon. Not tonight though, because I've wasted enough time on that as is.

I hung out with a few high school friends tonight, Desiree and Katie. I had a really great time, too. Scored some pictures from my graduation night, and a cute one with my family. It makes me happy, so I'd say it's one I'd consider putting on my desk at work.

Side note: If you're reading this, I need to take some new pictures of you. I'd like some fresh ones. I'll probably spend the next few weeks taking my camera everywhere with me...

I'm watching Pride and Predjudice again. Naturally, this means I've been cleaning my room. Clever, you. ;)

It's one of my favorite scenes. Lizzie, checking out Darveshire, hears music from another room. She drifts over, sees the reflecting of a little girl playing the piano. Clearly, Darcy's sister, Georgiana. The keys falter, girl jumps up, and we see the reflection of Darcy see Lizzie in the other room. Then, the best part, Lizzie runs as fast as she can away, grabbing her skirt to get away as quick as she can. Naturally, he chases her, but I like the scene of her running away anyway. And she's wearing flats, too. I heart.

Okay, enough, enough. Gossip for the interested masses: Lindsay moved back to Phoenix recently for school.

I also spent time with Cassie on Tuesday night. I feel a little bad, I couldn't really entertain her... I met up with her after her closing shift, so we got together around 11 p.m. I was tired, but it's the only time I have to devote to Cassie anyway, so I tried to make the best out of it. We got ice cream from McDonalds and chatted in my car. Amiable, good conversations.

Reminiscent of the hour and long evenings I have shared with the special lady in my life, in my string o' neons.

(Now L is crying, because, Lydia has run away! With Mr. Wickham!)

I also spent time today with Mom and Dad. Also a great time. Everyone was in a good mood, for the most part, but it was another lesson in my ability to keep people from fighting. There were several points in the afternoon when mom or dad would have gotten upset with each other, but I was there to add and extra comment, or make a joke, or redirect conversation...

I think it's the same thing that the Robins were saying when we got back from San Anotonio, that I have some talent for keeping people cheerful?

Maybe. I dunno.

I thought I should blog, but I haven't anything interesting to say...

Oh! Quick Harvest Moon note: I finally found the GODDAMNED STORE. It's silly, really. The fact is there ISN'T a store. I've finally realized it's a strange mix of Harvest Moon: Friends of Mineral Town and Harvest Moon: It's a Wonderful Life. See, you live and work in the It's a Wonderful Life town (PS2 version, my pro-farming peeps) and you do your shopping over the phone by calling the Friends of Mineral Town stores. And lemme tell you, it's weird calling up your ex-husband (Gray) to upgrade your axe. I tell you, not one kind word from my sexy, brooding blacksmith boy...

(Mr. Darcy? The very insolence of it. What is he thinking, coming here?)

Okay, my loves. Kisses and I'm out.

Alice

I don't want to alarm anyone...

2007-08-09T12:25:00.000-07:00

But the fact that Rachel R will be hanging out with me tonight is blowing my freaking MIND.

Wowowowowoowowowowwowoowowowowwoowoowowowowoowwow....

::breath::

Think about ham, think about ham, ham ham ham.

Alice

Tarped!

2007-08-08T11:24:00.000-07:00

It's Wednesday at nearly noon fifteen, and I'm in bed.

It's a nice bed, pink sheets, green blanket, soft kitty to keep me warm.

I'm downloading music. (Shh, don't tell the feds...)

Thursday, I'm having a lovely lady over at my place. And in preparation of sleeping with said lovely lady, I washed my sheets. Because, apparently, its some combination of never being home and only sleeping on one side that's left the right side of my bed a dusty.

It's sad, really.

But now! Soft, clean, dust free. Hopefully, inviting.

Now, the tarp story.

After I had bid adieu to the man Marcia calls my hubby, I walked around the corner to my usual parking spot.

My car had been wrapped in plastic. (I should have taken a picture, it looked great; but I was distracted.)

The landscapers were out this morning, trimming trees and the like, and had wrapped Bumblebee for its own safety, I suppose.

I was in a good mood, so I immediately started giggling. One of the landscapers looked up at me, taking in my morning attire: stripey boxers, white cami, and kitty slippers.

I was dressed for early morning fun, and bed, not for the public embarrassment of having to pull armfuls of plastic off my car while landscapers watch me.

Believe me, none of them stopped to help. Stopped to watch, naturally. But help? Not a chance.

I got the car mostly unwrapped (they did a very thorough job, even wrapped the tires) when Matt rounded the corner to leave and saw me.

He stopped to help. What a nice boy.

Now, this might be even more amusing to mention that this is my second run in with the landscaping crew. One time, with my iPod on, blasting loudly, I bounced outside to my car (tank top and jeans this time, not too bad) to get something. I was dancing the entire way, not paying attention. I did my usual bend and reach in the back seat, looking for clothes or something, still dancing and shaking my butt. Stand up, straighted my top, look up the street to see the entire crew of landscapers watching me. Big smiles.

Since I refuse to be embarassed by my silly behavior, I did then what I did this morning. Big smiles, eye contact and waves. :D

And that's the story of how I brightened the day of a few strangers. G'bye, off to download more tunes.

Alice

The School Post

2007-08-05T13:57:00.000-07:00

Alright, I relent. A post about school.

In conversation with work friend Marcia, I told her I had decided to take the Fall semester off, because all the classes I needed were full. She approved, but asked if I had filed a declaration of absence for the coming semester. I had not. And more than that, had no idea you have to.

She explained that you can't just not go. This was hard news for me. I love just not going. (Let's just not, and say we did. Can't I just NOT go to work/class/the doctor?)

So I decided to take one class, also considering the ASU blog Lori might let me do. If I do the blog and am not currently in school, I'd feel like a hypocrite.

I dialed up the course catalog, looking for at least one course to take. Turns out, all the ones I had needed were now open.

So cue instant dilemma. I was really looking forward to a little break from school, what with my life and crazy busy schedule slowly driving me insane. Also, I was planning a week-long trip to Houston to visit my family. Really, quite excited to do that.

But (as I would explain to my grandmother later in the week) I don't take breaks very well. So I enrolled for the following classes:

JMC394*- Multimedia Reporting
JMC465 - Precision Journalism
JMC425 - Online Media
POS315 - The Supreme Court

* I'm not officially in this yet, I need to get instructor approval from the school first.

So that's my fall. The hours aren't to crazy, either, and I've sent my bosses two mock schedules to play with. One with Saturday and Sunday off (::hopes::) and one with Tuesday and Saturday off.

I have a game plan, now, and I'll be done with school in Spring of '08. (You're excited, I can tell)

Hasta luego, con amor y gatitos.

Alicia

Walking to Hearthome City

2007-08-04T16:39:00.000-07:00

I've been playing Pokemon Pearl for ... at least 6 hours now.

It's Saturday, and I'm working. But on the bright side, there's only... four more days until I get a day off! Yes, I see the positives already. Oh, and what a sweet Wednesday that will be, though I imagine I'll just use it to run some sort of errand.

(Your foe's Prinlup has fainted! Way to go, Squeak!)

I should have done this earlier, but I'm updating my desk calendar. Let's see what I've got coming up...

Aug. 8: My first off day in a while.
Aug. 11: Driving school.
Aug. 20: Fall semester starts.
Aug. 23: Leave for Seattle
Aug. 24-26: PAX

That's all I've got of note up on the calendar now. I should write more, lots to say, but like I said, I played Pokemon all day and now I'm leaving work.

-A

I need to catch an Eevee

2007-07-29T14:17:00.000-07:00

Life updates:

1. I passed my reporting class. Let's hear it, nice and loud: rock-freaking-star. Well, not quite so much, I skated by with a C, but I'm still pretty happy. Never doing that again, I tell you what. (And by that, I might mean "slack off so bad my teacher really wants to fail me, or it could mean just taking JMC 301 again. 'Cause now I don't have to. So we'll see if this experience actually taught me anything, but here's to hoping!)

2. I'm working a lot for the next two weeks. Our newest teammate, New Beth, is vacationing in Martha's Vineyard. She's a bit of an alcoholic, if I do say so mahself. She's functional though, I swear. :D

So, that means I'm picking up her Saturdays, and working Wednesdays so we have the afternoons covered. So, looking at the calendar, I'll be working from Thursday, July 26 all the way through Aug. 8. ( I hope.) At any rate, I need that next Saturday off, because:

3. Traffic school! For $50, they have to teach me how to drive. Again. (I must suck a t this whole driving thing. Apparently, they don't like it when I hit things. Or speed.) So Aug. 11, I'll be spending another lovely Saturday parked in the Goodyear Ramada Inn, gettin' my learnin' on. Or something. I really should practice pinning my hair so I can have my iPod on the whole time. Maybe get a book on tape. Or, or! I might take a notebook and write up some bumper questions for my traffic column that I inherited from Waffles (inherited, because he will die because of this) and do them while I'm there. Basically, the column is a bunch of really lame questions sent in by old people (My next door neighbor has expired tags. I'm a hateful old hag and part nazi, who can I call to report them?) to which I gather answers. This might actually be a good idea, since I've been recycling content for WEEKS. I think I've done it honestly... once?

4. I have to house sit on Tuesday and Wednesday. Really, this just means I need to stay at home. This is hard for me.

5. SHARK WEEK!!!!!!

6. I'm at chapter 26 in the new Harry Potter. I'm excited. I spent all yesterday (Saturday) reading at my desk. Louie V., one of my favorite editors, came by.

Louie: What are you reading?
Me: The new Harry Potter.
Louie: Oh, are you at the part where she kills off ....
Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOO
Louie: I'm kidding. I've never read any, but I like telling people that Harry comes out of the closet at the end of the last book.

-- End Scene --

7. My boyfriend just said, "If I could have sex with Google, I would." ::tear::

8. I'm getting married on Wednesday morning. City hall. Kisses. Here's my wedding ring:

kidding....

9. I made cookies last week, and they sucked. Mostly burnt and too sweet. I shall try again. See #4, provides extra opportunities for making foodz.

10. Waffles and I are making an extra effort to not eat out as much. So we're grocery shopping and making dinner. It's been fun so far. I made chicken with portobello mushrooms and red potatoes (I <3 potatoes) on Friday and Waffles made chicken quesadillas on Saturday. And we're headed to dinner at Waffle's parent's house tonight. Game set match.

Okay, that's about all I have left. Wait, I'll do some individual shout outs to all my fans--

Esther: Where are you? I'm glad you had fun on game night, I can't wait to do it again. Whenever you're feeling up to it, you know I love to host. I'm still annoyed that I forgot to wear my apron on Sunday. This will be fixed for next time. (It's so cute!!!)

Leah: I need to call you so much! I should have called today, since I don't really do anything at work. I'll call as soon as I'm off tonight, we'll have a chat while I head over to Ahwahtukee. And the Golden Eggroll sounds fantastic. I do love eggrolls.

Cassie: Are you a fan yet? Keep coming back? We need to go to a game, I'm so excited. :D They're mostly at home this month! Too bad I have to miss the Dbacks-Cubbies game. But if your Dad's in town, it'd be nice to take him.

Matt: I hate you, go blog. Thank you for making me a peanut butter sammich today. And yesterday. And chicken on Saturday. You're getting kinda good at feeding me.

Rachel the Whore: I have nothing to say to you, 'cept come for sleeps and movies on Tuesday.

G'night

Alice

The headline goes RIGHT HERE

2007-07-22T11:47:00.000-07:00

Yeah, when I saw the mock up of my story in today's paper, I suppose they hadn't quite picked a good one yet. It was cute in the layout though. They settled with "Going Back to School IN NEW DUDS". I approve.

< selfpromotion> So, for all my fans out there, check out B3 today and enjoy. It's nice. < /selfpromotion>

So in accordance with the weekend's predetermined schedule of fun, tonight I'm having a dinner party and game night.

Games on tap: Puerto Rico, Cranium, Balderdash, Fact or Crap (and for later more intimate ass-kicking session) MarioKart DS. (You're going down. You know who you are.)

Dinner: Pork chops of Dad's favorite creamy/tasty variety, mashed potatoes, greek salad (Yes, Rachel, my goal is to make one as good as we had the other night), cake (chocolate variety with white frosting) and if I have time I'll bake cookies.

But then again, I've been saying that for a while now. We'll see how it goes.

Also, I'll probably make broccoli because I bought a fresh stem last week or so, and I should probably use it. At least cook it so I can use it in lunchies next week.

And I should make tea, too. And I want to mop the floor again, because I don't think I did a very good job yesterday. We'll see about that too, I might be running out of time here.

Game plan:
1. Get off work at 5.
2. Pick up Waffles. (5:15)
3. Get home. (5:40)
4. Change into pink tank top (5:42)
5. Start cooking.

So according to that plan, I say my peeps (i.e., you) can show up around 6, 6:30. I'll be ready. Dinner should be ready around 7, and we can start Puerto Rico right after dinner.

Oh, I have to make cinnamon rolls tonight too. :D

It's part of The Best Monday Ever, I'll fill you in on those details at a later date.

-Alice

At the end of a mostly bad week...

2007-07-15T10:49:00.000-07:00

Today marks the close of seven quite sucky days. In a row. A very hard week.

First off, Monday, where upon arrival to my class, my professor points out that I have more stories due than I can possibly turn in according to the syllabus. Meaning, she told me I either drop or she has to fail me.

Which sucked. So a terrible, no-good, very bad morning followed. Matt tried his best to cheer me up, and I made plans to meet up with Amanda that evening. I left class as early as I could, feeling like a failure. (which I am, but besides the point.) Since I was feeling very down on myself, I tried listening to high-energy music, but when I started crying during a Fall Out Boy Song (I'm like a lawyer, always trying to get you off (me & you)) I changed tactics and stuck my iPod on Radiohead songs.

Matt and Marcia tried to cheer me up at lunch, and when I got back to my desk feeling slightly better (and if I were to refer to the 'ol Quantify Alice's Mood Game, I'd give myself a 3 out of 10) my Prof., C., had emailed me. (subtract all three points I'd gained)

She said the best I could do is turn in at least one story a day, and she would accept them. But if I missed a day, including Saturday and Sunday, the deal was off and she'd fail me.

Matt and Marcia both encouraged me to try, so I did. And that's been me this week, trying to finish 11 stories, with at least one a day, by the end of class (this coming Wendesday). You know, plus being a bad-ass at work, too.

*Note: If you remember, I had made plans to see Amanda on Monday. I didn't follow through, and I suck for that. I had honestly forgotten all about her in the excitement/stress/sadness of the day, until I got her text at 9. I am a terrible person, since I know Amanda probably needs some good bonding time too. And I am a date-breaker.

In the course of this, Matt stepped up to keep me on track, which I absolutely appreciate. He, first off, helped me believe I could actually do this, which as of Monday morning, seemed impossible. (He seems to have unshakable faith in me, which I'm sure is misplaced.) Secondly, he helped me find story ideas and keep to the Game Plan. We even got lunch on Thursday at Unos, and spent most of it plotting on paper napkins, which I hung on my cubical at work:

So he played the role of editor all week, it was great. He set me deadlines, stricter than absolutely necessary, to make sure I get ahead. And, my punishment if I didn't finish a story I said I would, I didn't get to see him.

Here's a selection of his cheering me on:

Waffles: That first link is freaky
2:16 PM The second one is cute
Are you going to call/email Christia?
2:20 PM me: Yes, I'll email her.
2:21 PM Waffles: Please take her up on the offer.
She's really going out on a limb for you. People like that, you want to listen to/make happy.
2:22 PM me: Ick... I don't want her to go out on a limb for me. Or her to think I'm a failure.
Waffles: Then do as she says!!!
me: I WANT to ignore it and have it dissappear.
Waffles: NO!
me: ::poof::
2:23 PM Waffles: That's how you got in this problem to begin with
Rachael Quattrini
you better bust your ass for this woman
Do not chicken out of this.
me: You're very good at being my cheerleader, you know.
Waffles: I hope I am.
2:24 PM I am right. Trust me on this. You can do this.
You are more than capable of doing it.
And when you do it
and succeed
which you will do
I'll throw a big giant party at Piestewa Peak for you
With all your friends
2:25 PM me: lol
Is that bribery?
Okay, I can do this.
2:26 PM Waffles: It's not bribery
me: I have this story for Lori due, plus I have the AIMS story done that I can turn in.
So theres two by tomorrow
Waffles: Exactly
see!?
You can do this
me: And tonight I'll make a list of what I have left to do and figure out what to cover.
Waffles: You're a rock star.
You can do it.
me: I'll do a court case and two public meetings wednesday
since those are the pains
Waffles: Don't listen to Debbie Downer
me: LOL
Waffles: She's a bitch
and a whore
and a liar
A lying bitch whore
who's been sitting inside your mind for far too long
me: lol
2:27 PM Waffles: I'm fucking exterminating that rancid cunt
Burning her out with fucking flamethrower
that will conveniently only hurt her.
me: Good, cause that would be a flame thrower applied to my mind
Waffles: I know. That's why I had this flame thrower especially made
2:29 PM me: :D
Waffles: And let me know if you need me to do anything to help
and don't whine about not needing help
if it's the difference between not making it through this and making it
accept the help
Besides reporters ask me for things all the time
me: no help
2:30 PM I don't like help.
:D
2:31 PM Waffles: I know you don't like help. I'm not reporting or writing for you
but I can get you numbers
or do analysis for you
like I do for reporters all over this newsroom
For my uni payroll story I got all sorts of help from Anne.
2:32 PM me: Then I shall stay away from numbers!
:D
Waffles: :p
me: numbers = the devil anyway
2:33 PM Waffles: Spoken like a true reporter
2:35 PM Just know
you're going to be sick of me nagging you for the next three weeks
The rules are thus:
2:36 PM me: three weeks?
The class is over next week.
Waffles: oh
ok for the next week
:D
me: Yep, I don't even have three weeks.
Don't nag...
Waffles: Either way
I will
the rules are thus:
me: I don't want to have to cut you...
Waffles: You cannot hang out with me
unless you've finished your story for the day
me: OMG that made me gasp
2:37 PM You just squeazed the air out of me
lol
Waffles: So you know I'm serious.
Good.
Remember that
and get your stories done so I can see you
And no fricking lying
2:38 PM I would be absolutely apocolyptic if you lied to me so you could hang out with me.
me: ...
Waffles: You cannot imagine how mad I'd be.
2:40 PM me: oh dear.
Waffles: I'm dead serious though.
I'd be really really really mad.
So do your stories.
:D

And it especially doesn't help that my sweetie is also busy at work, being a data master (I is in ur public records, analyzin' ur payrollz'). I mean, he's been great, and it's a little fun having both of us being busy kicking ass, taking names. Feels like we're a team, out to conquer all.

But really it's just been a string of days where we both end up exhausted, feeling like a cheese grated has been working our souls into piles of lemon zest.

So, I've been doing that this week. One story a day, mostly. Tuesday, I did three and I think I did two another day this week. But as of right now, I'm rocking 8 stories completed.

Monday, my indepth story is due. And then all I'll have left is a politics story, which I'll do something short and sweet to have it all finished in time.

When I'm done, next week, (Monday, that's my self-deadline) I'm going to be so extra nice to Matt! I'll be like his secretary, bring him soda and neck massages every hour*. Pretty much July is going to suck for him, so I'll be as sweet as I can to help the month pass quickly and pleasantly as possible.

*Funny story: On day, in the break room getting lunch with Marcia, I ran into one of my most favorite reporters, who was getting soup with one of my least favorite reporters. Least favorite reporter knows about Matt and I, while my favorite did not. So, of course, my least favorite (who's nickname is F-er, btw) has to rat me out by teasing me. Cue terrible blushing and shyness, etc.

So, days later, Favorite reporter stops Matt on his way out to lunch, and proceeds to tell him how much she likes me and approves of him. The way he tells it, she says very nice things (smart as a whip, cute as a button) and that I deserve a great guy, but he'll do. (See? She's funny.)

*End Scene

So that's my plan for this week. Lemme outline it for you again.

This Week

1. Kick more ass, take more names
2. Have class work completed by Monday
3. Be extra nice to Matt this week
4. Speak at NIE conference Wednesday
5. Rock out at Snow Patrol concert Wednesday night
6. Make family time!
7. Catch up on social engagements (Amanda! Jenny!)
8. Have a game night?
9. Catch more Pokemon!
10. Find the store in Harvest Moon DS. Seriously, this is just sad. Girl needs some seeds!!!
11. Pay credit card bill, aw yeah
12. Whatever else that would make me, Matt, or my friends and family happy.
13. Sleep more.

Isn't that nice? I'm liking this already.

Oh, but for tonight!

Tonight!!

1. Speech story: Former rocker "Head" from the band Korn is speaking at Phoenix First Assembly about Jesus and his faith reformation. Go, write, turn in.
2. Laundry!
3. Cook dinner. Wait, I need to pick up feta cheese on the way home, since I want to try cooking what I had the other night at this greek restaurant. But with more olives. (I likes olives)
4. Clean, watch a movie, lay out clothes for tomorrow
5. Call Matt Darling
6. Catch me some Pokemon! (until I pass out)

That's it, that's all I've got. Other than my love and inspiring personal warmth to share with all*.

*Related story:

Rachel is a m'f'ing ice princess! She's frigid, and I mean temperature-wise! At the concert, during a snack break (that mess of a concert was FIVE hours long.) I got sleepy and started laying on Matt. Rachel came over, just to add to my snuggle-comfort, I'm sure, but she was cold as ice! So I took one hand, and stuck it under my shirt so she was grabbing my side, and held her other hand to keep it warm.
Because I am an inexhaustible source of heat. :D

Okay, done now. If you have any suggestions for my week, feel free to add on to my to -do list.

Closing with catz,
A

Since everyone else is doing it...

2007-07-04T10:12:00.000-07:00

catz!! KTHXBYE.

Sorry

2007-07-03T06:20:00.002-07:00

Still alve good mornng

2007-07-03T06:20:00.001-07:00

Little blue pills again

2007-07-02T20:48:00.000-07:00

Good evening. Didn't think I'd post tonight, did you? Well, I do this sometimes. Mix things up. Tonight's theme: reasons why Alice is a bitch.

Three things I have to apologize for:

1. The "better offer". I recognize this when I see it, because I've done it. To people, all the time. You make plans with someone, then break them or change them up when something more fun comes along. Yeah. I know I've done this to Cassie plenty of times, and I don't feel guilty like I should (see number 3) but I also know I've done this to Dad before, and probably Rachel. Hell, probably all of my friends. So, sorry, Dad, Rachel and Cassie.

2. Combining stuff/people/activities just because it would make me happier. Wow, I can't believe how selfish that really is! And I've done this too!!! To Rachel and to Marcia! I don't really listen to them when they're trying to tell me no, that it's a bad idea, and I pout if they don't go along for it! I'm sorry, Rach, now I finally get it.

3. I am a user. I use people. When I was upset earlier, and didn't want to talk about it in any depth, who did I call?

Cassie.

Whom I haven't spoken to in WEEKS. Why did I call? Because I knew she would entertain me and keep it superficial. I know I don't treat her like I should or like any FRIEND would, and I keep her on the back burner just so she can entertain me when I need it.

I am such a terrible person.

And now, to explain the blog title: I'm annoyed with being conscious, so I took six sleeping pills and am currently chasing it down with Smirnoff. See older blog post should I die. It's some time in December.

Drinkies gone. ::burp::

im gonna watch aqa teen until I pass out

Screwed.

2007-07-01T12:32:00.001-07:00

And again, not in the good way.

Can't register for classes until Parking and Transit services removes the hold from my account. Shi....

And, while I was trying to register, it turns out one of the TWO classes that I'd found that actually meet my graduation requirements are now full.

Godammitsonofabitchgodihateschooli'mnevergoingtograduateatthisrate.

Shit.

Looks like all that's open is Media Law. So, question. Do I build a crappy schedule around ONE class or just not go this semester?

BTW, did you know I hate my life?

Kisses,

Alice

Quiz time!

2007-07-01T11:52:00.001-07:00

Okay, now I'm just trolling for filler. Time for a myspace quiz! (Care of Cassie, of course, who is the only person I know that still fills these out.)

Stuff that you should know about me (This is important, take notes)

1. What is the middle name of the first person you ever slept with?
John

2. What kind of underwear are you wearing and what color?
Blue and white cotton panties with a hot pink bra. Yes, I'm not so much for matching, but if I had to give it a theme, it would be loud.

3. What is the song you want played at your funeral?
Something by The Decemberists. Wait, I really just want them to play my funeral. Summersong for sure. And you will all cry! (Commandment, not an guess. There WILL be tears.)

4. Would you tell your parents if you're gay?
Absolutely. Heck, I think I'll tell Dad tonight just to mess with him.
"Dad, I'm gay."
"No you're not."
"Sure I am. It was Rach's hot rack that turned me around."

5. What would your last meal be before getting executed?
Oh, oh! Well, I have my real answer, and then a better answer. Real answer would be that I'd demand mom's mac and cheese and a bunch of potato dishes. But a BETTER answer, would be that I'd ask for Zebra mignon with a baby seal sauce just to see if I'd get it. Served with potatoes, of course.

6. Beatles or Stones?
Beatles!

7. If you had to pick one person on earth who should die, who?
Hilary Clinton? ROFL. Stop her before she kills the earth....

8. Beer, wine or hard liquor?
Hard liquor. Wait, does that make me a party girl or something? That's got to say something negative...

9. What is the thing most important to you about your mate?
This question sucks. I'll copy edit for clarity: What is the most important quality your mate possesses?

A: First off, not a fan of the term, mate. Makes me feel like I'm a breeding sparrow or something. But! Most important to me is... honesty.

10. What are your plans for the future?
Step one: Get out of school.
Step two: Get a job.
Step three: Conquer Uzbekistan.

Actually, my planning pretty much ends at step two. I suppose after that would be to buy a nice place. Little house or something.

12. Do you walk around the house naked?
Sadly, yes. Common naked paths include: from bedroom, to bathroom and vice versa, and from bedroom to laundry room, where I've probably forgotten to get my clothes out of the dryer. Now if we're talking next to naked, that goes straight out the window. If I'm somewhat clothed, I'll go almost anywhere.

13. How many drinks does it take to get you drunk?
About 6. I'm guessing, here. It seems like a lot though.

14. Where is your best friend?
Waddell, Arizona. In a wheelchair. And I'm guessing rolling around the kitchen getting herself lunch.

15. Hair color you like on someone you're dating?
Blonds are pretty hot...

16. Would you rather be blind or deaf?
Shit! That's hard. Blind, that way I can still communicate. Grr...

17. Do you have any special talents?
Ha! Not a one!

20. Favorite hateful thing to do to someone?
lol. I like to gossip and make fun of people all the time. Sometimes I enjoy saying hurtful things on purpose. Other than that, I kinda chicken out of doing hateful things because I feel guilty...

21. First movie you can remember seeing as a kid?
I have a really bad memory, so I'll go with Jurassic Park. I know that's not really even close to the first movie, but that's all I can recall at the moment. Goldfish.

22. What do you do as soon as you walk in the house?
I look for mail in my Dad's office.

23. When's the last time you went on a date?
I'm going to say Wednesday, because I made Matt take me to a movie. At a specific time. So that makes it a date, right?

24. Do you like horror or comedy?
Comedy more. I don't mind horror but it's usually just not that interesting. Wait, that's like, slasher flicks, not say, Silence of the Lambs. Or Seven. Those rock.

26. Person you most wish you hadn't made out with?
Ha, RJ. ::shame::

28. If you weren't straight, what person of the same sex would you do it with?
I'll say Rachel, first off, because I did reference her hot rack earlier. Then I'd go with... Jessica Alba. She has a such a pretty smile!

29. Where do you want to live when you are old?
Not in a retirement home. But I'll say in my Tech Castle. (It's actually just a nice house with a basement that's filled with teh awez0mest toyz evah)

Oh, wait, F that. I want Dean Callinan's house. It's like, ridiculously huge, inside a gated community in a gated community. But it'll still be my tech castle. With a basement.

30. Who is the person you can count on most?
Ace McShank.

31. If you could date any celebrity past or present, who would it be?
I bet I'd get along well with Travis Buck, so I'll say him.

32. Where was your first kiss with your mate?
Outside of the Wildflower Bread Company at Arcadia. And I giggled during it. I am a dork.

33. Favorite drinking game?
Seven Deadly Sins.

34. What did you dream last night?
I dreamed my mate's mother was yelling at him and his friends to stop being such slackers while I was hosting a game night at my own little house, and I sort of started a fight by defending them. Oh, and I was curling my hair at the time. Lots of nice curls...

Okay, done! Wasn't that fun???? Time to register for fall, ta ta for now.

And one more thing--

2007-07-01T11:27:00.001-07:00

I'm creating copy, filling space, keeping the readers intereseted. Let's keep the ball rolling here, with more of my mostly entertaining thoughts.

I just paid ASU $100. In parking tickets.

Are you asking yourself why? You should be. The anti-establishment answer would be that ASU is holding my education hostage over fees they have no right to charge me, since they are not a law enforcement agency anyway.

The anti-Alice POV would be that, Alice is a slacker who is financially irresponsible and shouldn't be let out on public streets anyway.

The real answer would be some mix of the two. I (irresponsibily) let several tickets pile up, and ASU wouldn't let me register for Fall until I'd paid up.

And now, I should be okay to register for Fall. Ick...

I'm really starting to hate school, know that? Just really truly. Ready to be done. Hate that I have another year. Hate that I'm a slacker and have no one to blame for that except me. (And the souless entity that is ASU, of course)

Now I have to wait till noon to register. It's sunday, after all.

Oh, you know what else I did recently? I bought and in less than four hours, LOST my copy of Harvest Moon DS. ::sigh:: I was so ready to woo those farm girls! Oh, the flowers I would give!!!!

Basically, I bought it about two weekends ago, with Pokemon Pearl. I opened the box, read the book, stuck the cartridge in my jeans, layed on a couch while playing Pokemon with Waffles, took nap, followed through rest of day, check jeans before bed, and could not find.

And honestly, as my fans and admirers would tell you, that's pretty much par for the course for Alice. Dang it.

So I'm stuck (happily) collecting my Pokemon. It's fun, I'm not really complaining, but I do feel like an idiot when I think about it. 'Specially since I specifically held off till Summer to buy it anyway, so I wouldn't destroy my GPA and give up on sleep entirely.

And now, I won't just run out and rebuy it, since I'm TRYING to save money, and blowing 70$ every weekend on games or music at ZIA isn't a good idea.

I only went to Zia to get Icky Thump. I swear, that's all I walked away with. I was good!

Okay, I'll post again when I register. Three in one day, I know you're excited. :D

What? You're still here?

2007-07-01T10:28:00.001-07:00

Yeah, it's been a while. But let's just say I've been sufficiently nagged by one of my most favoritest people in the world enough to spur me into action. Most favoritest...

Let's see, shall we? What's been going down in Alice Land of late...

Oh, okay. I had a B3 Thursday this week. Which was fun. I came into work on Wednesday after class to take Waffles to lunch, but when I sat down at my desk to check my email, my editor came up and asked me to do a quick daily story. Turns out, not so much "quick" as in, short and easy. Quick as in, "intense, want it now". But I had fun, and I felt like a rock star. When I get to do fun stuff like that, it reaffirms my career choice. ::sigh::

Also, Rachel and I started watching The 10th Kingdom miniseries last week. We watched one tape last Sunday. I feel kinda bad, because I know Rachel wants to finish it, but she's patiently waiting for me to watch it with her. Except that I don't have a lot of time for late night VHS viewing. So tonight, I'm hoping to make that up by having her over for dinner and fun. The only downside I can see is that I have a very, very tiny VHS tv. But I think I can over come that by dragging it into my bedroom, and enjoying the movie from the snuggled comfort of my wonderful, bepillowed bed. (Yes, I made up the word. It's a nice one.)

The series is great. I'm actually really excited. According to IMDB, because I have a goldfish-like memory, this came out my freshman year of high school. I remember watching parts of it with Mom. :D And of course, rehashing with Rachel the next day. And oh man, we were all about Scott Cohen, who plays Wolf! I feel really dorky admitting it, but it's true. Sad but true.

But tonight will be the second of three tapes. Aw, yeah, you heard me. Tapes.

Thinkthinkthink, what to do to entertain...

Waffles and I are good. Which is great (For me, anyway). He had an A1, and let me just say, I'm in love with a rock star. :D

We had our second fight... two weeks ago? I know it was a Thursday at any rate.

But fights suck. He made a joke that hurt my feelings, and being me, I can't just say that and have it out right there. Nope! I have to let it marinate and fester for days. And it's not like he can't tell; he's not a moron and I know that. He's asking, "Are you okay? What's wrong? Are you upset?" and I'm going, "No, no, I'm fine. Don't worry.". Meanwhile, I'm trying to think of a way I can get to my car so I can run away without having to talk about it.

I'm not happy about that, but I just know it's the way I am. I'd love to be able to just talk stuff out, but it's part of my shyness. My first instinct is usually to lie about my feelings. I'm working on it. Actually, I'm working lots of little parts of my shyness. It's something new for me, having to share my life with someone.

For example, I try not to complain when he buys me stuff. Like dinner. I used to always complain, but not so much anymore.

Or, changing in front of him. It's completely silly, but I used to leave the room to change or make him turn around. But I'm getting used to letting him stay. And it helps, that he's completely sweet about it and tries to look away. Helps my sanity out some. There's also a really good example from this morning which I won't share, but I'm patting myself on the back. I even made a little sarcastic and self depricating comment, which must mean I'm getting better. :D

And thirdly, (I was just thinking about this now) I'm working on sharing my thoughts. I know, that sounds really lame, but the thing with quiet people is that they spend a lot of time thinking. Now, the thoughts are usually the smae thing as with loud and outgoing people, I'm not going to say I think anything particularly deep. Most of the time, they're really inane, and that's part of why I just don't say it. This thought isn't worth the energy I would waste by speaking it.
Or something like that.

And then compound that with a girl that loves to laugh, and you get a strangely quiet person that sometimes starts giggling for no reason at all. And this is how it ALWAYS goes down:

Scene- an afternoon drive. Two people sit, listening to NPR. It's the Market Report.

::silence::

Alice: Tee hee hee.
Matt: What?
Alice: Nothing.
Matt: No, what?
Alice: Silly. Nothing.
Matt: Come on, share.
Alice: No.
Matt: Please?
Alice: It's nothing, really.
Matt: C'mon, share, please?
Alice: Ahhh, fine. Just, I was just thinking... (insert any really weak but mildly funny idea. I'd do it, but I can't think of anything specific)
Matt: (pause) Oh.

See, that's how it always goes. Or something similar, where I apparently get a look on my face that demands to be explained. And I'm sure these things would be much more funny or relevant if I would just SAY it when I think it...

So anyway, I'm working on that, too. For example, this morning, after getting donuts:

Alice: (Opens milk, takes a sip, looks at the bottle.)
Matt: What? Is your milk okay?
Alice: Sure. It's chocolately and delicious.
Matt: You had a look. What were you thinking?
Alice: (Did NOT say, nothing.) I was wondering why Dunking Donuts stocks this brand of milk. Swiss-something, and not Shamrock, since Shamrock is a local company and a pioneer of the consumer sized bottled milk trend.
Matt: Maybe this milk is less expensive?
Alice: Than something locally produced? Possibly. But then again, Dunkin Donuts isn't a local company so I doubt they'd care about Shamrock anyway.
Radio: ... mumble mumble.... Elvis Costello covers...
Matt: oooh. (turns it up)

--End Scene--

So anyway, that might be a little lame, but it's proof that I'm working on it. And when we slid back into silence just after that, I started thinking about the milk industry some more.

Hmm, I think I might be rambling at this point, so I'm going to post this, read through it, and maybe keep going in another post. Let's see, shall we?

Deceptive lizard

2007-05-12T13:17:00.000-07:00

I'm sick.

It's not fun. I started being sick Wednesday night. I had a little bit of an earache, and by Thursday morning, it felt like my ear was on fire. Plus runny nose, fever, cough, etc. Just general suckyness. I left work early on Thursday and Friday (as soon as I could, because I can't pass my stuff onto anyone else, as I'm the exact bottom of the totem pole and there isn't anyone else who knows how to do my stuff) and headed home for naps and games of Civ IV.

I hate being sick, but even more than that, I hate going to the doctor. So mostly, I've been hiding in my room like it's a leper colony, treating my bed like an island. I even "watched" a few DVDs while starting some DS games.

The only upside to me being sick this weekend is that J.W. is out of town. This way, I can't get him sick. It's good; I'd feel even worse if I were spreading my pathogens to my loved ones.

Friday, Rachel, Dad and I went to dinner. Pick Up Stix, and ice cream. Tasty. Conversation involved Dad trying to convince me that Guiliani is a more experienced candidate that Obama. It basically went round and round for a while, when I killed it by saying, "I can't verify any of the statements you're making right now, and as such, I refuse to accept them just because you're saying it." I also got annoyed with Rachel, for saying that I wouldn't be able to find a place in the area I want in my price range. Which is crap, and the way she said it seemed to suggest she thought I was completely ignorant. Anyway, I got snippy, but that may have been because I'm sick.

After dinner, Rachel came back to my place and helped me search everything for my iPod. Which I'm almost ready to declare missing. Right now, I just can't find it. A week more, and it's gone. So we searched and searched, and I used the searching time to re-straighted my room after two days of flopping around like a caterpillar on my bed. (And you all know how much I like cleaning.)

So, all tidied up, Rachel and I settled in to finish a game of Civ. I won, by a lot. By peaceable means, though. But now that I know what I'm doing, I'm done playing it on easy. :D

After that, I checked my email to find Jeff on, bubbling with details to share about his Keg Bong. All I can say: bad ass.

Mum came home around midnight, and I was still up, so I decided to swing by the store to pick up more tissues on the way to drop Rachel off at home. Since it's after midnight at this point, I had no issue with going out in my gray boy shorts, dark blue tank top, and slippers (one piggie, one bunny). Oh, and a French scarf tied around my shoulders like a cape. Again, this I blame entirely on me being sick.

So we get to the store, and it's a lot busier than I anticipated. But I roll with it; I have no shame when I'm sick. I did take my cape off, though. Collected the goods I needed, and even stopped for a dance party in the cat food aisle. (Someone was nice enough to leave us some Nirvana on.)

Then I took Rachel home, and came back for bed.

Now it's Saturday, and I'm at work again. Since there's no one close enough to infect anyway, I'm staying the full day. I'm stocked with tissues, and I brought soup for lunch. So far I've watched two episodes of Lost and read through a month's worth of Cyanide or Happiness. And updated my Myspace page... so basically, very little. I'm excited to go home and nap some more. I'm feeling about 60% better right now, and I think by tonight, it'll be up to 70%.

Tomorrow, Johnny Waffles comes home. Woot! (I'm excited.) Two thoughts on that: A) Weddings suck (stop falling in love and getting hitched people, there's entirely too much work involved in all that anyway) and B) Traveling sucks. Stay home where you belong, everyone!

My goals for tonight:

A) Nap
B) Shower (that's right, I have to plan ahead. I'm like a cat when I'm sick. It takes a lot of energy to make me get in the water.)
C) Find iPod! (Fingers crossed on this one, I'm hoping I'll just walk in and it'll be somewhere random and hidden in plain sight.)
D) Have Rachel come visit me for a game of Puerto Rico
E) Update Myspace page with Dinosaur pictures
F) Repaint toes
G) Find my Pride and Predjudice DVD and listen to it while I play more Civ.

Okay, that's all I've got. I hope you enjoyed my May post.

Just FYI

2007-05-02T08:48:00.000-07:00

I'm working on the religion calendar in my pjs right now. This may be the coolest thing ever.

Next up, coffee and a bagel, laundry, shower, pick up Matt for lunch, then school.

Have a lovely Wednesday, my peeps.

-A

How to make Friday your bitch

2007-04-21T11:01:00.000-07:00

In the warm Saturday afterglow, I'm fairly confident I just had the funnest Friday night ever. Want the run down?

Friday at work sucked a lot. A LOT. Checks, trying to catch up on school stuff, trying to find lost checks, just busy-busy. And then on top of all that, Boss Man asks me to transcribe and copy edit his daughters homework. Which I can tell you, when you're typing up and editing the homework of a fifth grader, you feel like human scum. Thinking to myself, I am so talentless, I'm only good enough to do his kid's homework.

Course, I know that's not true, but still felt like crap.

Anyway, when 4:30 finally rolled around and I had finished my goodbyes to the M.T., Matt and I left, with no real goal in mind. Only a vague idea that we should do something that requires us to compete. While we mulled ideas around, I drove around (finding all the finest traffic in downtown Phoenix, I assure you) in search of a sno-cone place that sells BLUE RASPBERRY sno-cones. (This is important, because the first place I stopped didn't have it. And sno-cones only come in blue, as far as I'm concerned.) With my sno-cone goal achieved, we decided to play mini-golf at Castles and Coasters.

I was the red ball. Yes, that's important to note, because it factors into my mini-golf strategy. First, I tuck my hair behind my ears so I can see, long enough to get a general direction to hit the ball in. I make some pretense of lining up my shot. Then I whacked it. Hard. I over-shoot every hole. Frequently, it bounces off the course. Once last night, I hit it hard enough to go down the course, bounce back, past me, and roll into the water. Another time, I hit it past the course I was working on, into the putting range of the next course over, decided to just play the ball where it lay, wound up and hit it as hard as I could, and it bounced off a cement border and hit me in the shin. It hurt.

Now, the red ball is important to note, because red things are naturally faster. Red cars, for example, drive faster. This I know to be true.

Matt's strategy is almost the opposite. He had the white ball, and as far as I can tell, he actually LINES stuff up, plots it out, then hits the ball gently. Usually under shoots it, which causes difficulty for him when it comes time to put it in. He even got a hole in one, the lucky bastard.

I'm not going to say he's better than me at mini-golf. I still maintain the game is flawed because it doesn't allow points for creativity. (Cause I gots LOADS of creativity. And flair) But Matt won. By a lot. Like, 25 to 46 or something.

By this time, my mood has been upgraded to "fully and completely happy" status. We headed inside, and were tempted into playing arcade games for a while. Good times, let me tell you what.

We played air hockey, too. And I freaking love air hockey. Course, not as much as Rachel does- she's passionate about it. And our air hockey games are so intense, it almost causes those passing by to collapse with the stress of it all. Matt's decent, but nowhere near as good as Rachel. So he was defeated handily.

I miss playing with Rachel. (If you're reading this, btw, we should go out for an air hockey and pool night). The games are so VIOLENT when we play! We're both really aggressive, so usually, three or four times in a game, we've hit the puck so hard it flies off the table. And I know we've gotten pinches and bruises from hands and fingers being in the way. Good times.

So, back to it. Air hockey, and some shooting game, Street Fighter (where I didn't realize until after the fact that Matt let me win the second round as per arcade etiquette, that punk. I thought I was doing okay, until he just killed me in the third round and the realization of my own domination became clear), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (I'm Rafael, btw. Sai pimp!) and X-Men and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in Time! We even beat X-Men, which was cool, because I've never finished an arcade game. And I can't count TMNT in Time, because I owned and adored that game on my SNES as a kid.

Quick highlights for the rest of the night: decided on Macayos for dinner, so I drove towards downtown. On Thomas and third ave, I passed a sign that said, "Sacks". It took me about two seconds to remember that that was a place Mummy Robins had mentioned Thursday night, so I whipped around into a parking lot, then cut across on the wrong side of the street to get to it. Closed, obviously, it was about 9:30, but it still felt good because I'd FOUND this place she'd mentioned, without actually having thought about it. Or googling it. Proud :) Course, I'm pretty sure I scared the hell out of Waffles, by driving on the wrong side of the road. He does a little silent scream thing, like Esther does. Instead of a quiet, "ahhhhh....." it's "ummmm..., babe?" (Like he's pointing out something I couldn't possibly know I was doing) followed by gripping the door or roof in silent terror.

So, dinner. Which took forever. But I was still happy, cause I was really craving some spinach enchiladas. And apparently I haven't had my Cassie time, because she's the only one that will eat there anymore. Specially after that whole glass incident...

And, back at Matt's, there were videogames. Super Mario Bros on our DS's, which was fun. Way fun. Waaaaaay fun. Actually, in retrospect, the key to fun with us is competing at stuff. Because talking trash is fun. But we played this one silly little game where you go collect huge stars. First one to five wins. You can pick them up whenever they appear on your level, or you can attack the other player and steal theres. So, guess which strategy I went with? Yeah. I won a few games by messing around until Matt had collected four stars, then I tried my hardest to steal all of his. Cause I am a biyatch. :D

Anyway, after losing to me so many times, Matt wanted to play Mario Kart. We raced for a bit, and I sucked at it (cause I was sleepy, thank you very much). Then we tried the non-race games, where you attack other players to steal balloons. But like I said, I was tired as all get out by that point, and I kept getting killed very early in the match, so after two rounds, I started driving off the edge (Shy Guy, commiting suicide. Who knew?) and falling asleep on Matt while he figured out how to play. It went like this:

(Game starts. Ready, set, go! Ding!)
Me: "Yay!" (Throws the car in reverse, drives right off the edge of this space level) "Oh, damn." (Puts the DS down, watches the Matt's screen.) "I died again."
Matt: "It's okay. I'm still trying to figure out how to..."
Me: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
GAME: Whiieeeoooowwwwww (The winner sound)
Matt: Number one! Eat it!
Me: What? Oh, good job, honey. Play again? Okay. (Game starts, I drive into Toad the three green shells circling his kart.) "Oh, damn. I died again." zzzzzzzzzzz....

Anyway, it was a helluva Friday. Must have, cause I think I just spent an hour describing it. And now it's time for me to find lunch and eat it. I'm out.

-A

Today?

2007-03-24T11:34:00.000-07:00

Hello, Saturday morning.

It's me, Alice. I hope you're having a lovely time.

I'm headed to a spring training game in a little bit. It should be fun. Then I have to head home to change for a post-wedding mixer. (Cute casual, like Tempe, not Scottsdale).

I'm done being pissed about work, I think. As a matter of fact, I played hooky on Friday to improve my mood. And I use "played hooky" loosely, because I warned everyone ahead of time, made sure all my work was finished in advance, and still went in for a bit to finish the checks. What can I say, I'm a push over. If I'd really wanted to stick it to them, I'd have just called in sick that morning. But I can't do that.

Anyway. Que pasandola? Saw TMNT last night, at the drive-in. It was fun, but I think I was over thinking it too much (who, me?) I was getting annoyed with the fact that Rafael has an accent and none of the rest of them do. Well, in retrospect, I guess Mikey has a californian accent, and that's even stranger... Oh well. Fun, though.

The rest of the night went well, too. All I can say is, Park Rangers. Oh yeah.

I got a speeding ticket on Thursday night and hit a parking meter in reverse yesterday.

The new Modest Mouse is rock tits. And Matt just left his iTunes on Shuffle, and Here Comes Santa Claus just came up. :D

Goodbye

Kiss me, I'm demonic

2007-03-17T18:49:00.000-07:00

Just had a rather interesting conversation with Mom. About my heritage.

During the Ohio State-Xavier game this morning (I heart Ohio) my Most Favorite Reporter (sarcasm) decided to chat me up in that 9-second stretch before Ohio tied it up for OT.

He's talking, I'm staring at the screen.

"Oh yeah. Aren't you Irish?" (Serious WTF moment. Then I remembered: It's St. Patty's Day, and I have red hair.)

"Um, no."

"What? Sure you are."

"I'm not. Not even a little."

"Fair skin, green eyes, and beautiful red hair? You're lying."

"No, I'm .... YESSSSSS!!!" (Okay, I'm guessing here. I don't remember exactly what I said, because they had just tied it up and I was excited.)

The fact is, I'm not Irish. Not even a little, as I'd said. I'm pretty much 100% Italian. But I do have the red hair and a love of potatoes. When I get annoyed with my family, and this happened a lot in Italy, I'd say something like, "Oh yeah? Well, fuck you, you dirty Italian." Or there's my favorite expression, "Just another dirt/lazy Giuseppe." It works out because the rest of my family does look Italian. And I look like the bastard red-headed stepchild.

Not bitter. This story's amusing, I swear.

So when I get home, Mom's watching a documentary about Ireland.

"Come watch this. You can pick out where you were born." I laughed a little, and told her what A had said.

"And I get that every year," I said. "But I'm not. Even a little bit. Maybe a bit from Grandma Q, she's like Irish and Italian or something."
"No, she's not from Ireland. She's from Hell." I laughed. "But on your other side, Grandpa Don's half English. Shorty, your great-grandfather, was English."
"And great grandma Alice?"
"Yeah," she smiled. "Alice was from Hell, too. A lesser demon, I think. One of Satan's underlings."

So that's where I get the red hair from. No Irish heritage, nothing like that. My hair comes from my Satanic heritage. Be afraid, boys and girls. Be afraid.

Previous highlights

2007-03-17T16:53:00.000-07:00

Friday was pretty awesome. I'll give you the highlights:

-March Madness games. This is really my first time watching actual games, and suprisingly, it's really freaking cool. And of course, Sametiming Marcia while we compared our brackets. Fun! (UNLV game was the best, though. She picked Georgia Tech. Silly girl)

-Went to another high school musical. Had another AWESOME time. I met lots of interesting kids, that were all warm and inviting, and even stayed for their show. Which was absolutely hilarious. Great time, even if I got home late, tired, and depressed.

- CRAZY MAIL! Woot! (Some background, for all my fans out there.) There's a man. Who writes mail. In colored ball-point ink. He only writes on the outside of the envelope. And fills every inch of it with notes to different reporters. I saw this particular crazy's mailings on my first day at the paper, and knew instantly, I could not wait for the moment that I would be on this insane little envelope.

Friday, completely out of the blue, I pick up his Friday letter, and there's me, in red.

"Alice McShank- *
G-Ps BILL ONLY STIM-
ULATES MORE OF ABOVE*"

Of course it doesn't make sense. Not really. He mentions that illegals are destroying the economy and education systems and other hate-filled nonsense, but honestly, it doesn't make any sense. But it's not supposed to. It's crazy mail.

Boy, it make my day. It's hanging on my cube. It's something special to know that a crazy person read your story, thought about YOU, personally, and picked up that set of pink, red purple and blue ballpoint pens to write you about it. ::sigh::

Today's highlights:

-Chatting with Matt :)
-The Ohio State-Xavier game. (Win for Ohio in OT!)
-The Pittsburgh-VCU game. (Pitt's #2, how the FUCK do you miss that free throw in DOUBLE OVERTIME, with TWO SECONDS left on the clock?? Come ON!)
-Acutally, all of my games were exceptionally close. I need to run home, though. Bye bye. :D

Update:
GARRRR Vanderbilt just KILLED Washington State. We were soooo close, there!!

Beige breakfast

2007-03-16T07:31:00.000-07:00

I'm tired. Sorry to complain, but I noticed this morning I've developed dark circles under my eyes. It's not a very happy sign, especially when I'm faced with the knowledge that I simply won't be getting any extra sleep this week.

(Valerie Plame is on CNN, testifying on Capitol Hill. There's also this woman in the back, wearing a bubblegum pink t-shirt that has "Impeach Bush Now" written on it. She's wearing a pink coat, which she obviously had buttoned to get inside. Clever, but she didn't think practically. The "Impeach" is directly across her chest, and the "Bush Now" part hits under her breasts, so it's hard to see. She's having to stretch out a bit so it gets seen. Oh, she just made a little cross with her fingers, lol. I wonder if she'll get thrown out.)

I'm eating oatmeal and drinking coffee. They both came out to about the same color, like breakfast made out of 80's eggshell plastic.

So tired.

Good morning.

An undercover assignment

2007-03-15T19:40:00.000-07:00

I'm at home.

It's 7:30 on a Thursday. I'm home, and I'm alone. Mom and Dad went shooting and out for pizza with the range crew. Rachel's out at dinner with her Vice President. Matt's in Vegas. Cassie could be anywhere, but I think it'd be a safe guess to say at work.

And I'm home alone.

It's nice, though. Dinah and Pepper seem happy to see me, so there's a plus.

I just got back from an assignment. Which is great, because I start to hate reporting when all I'm doing is rewriting press releases. When I get to actually go, talk to people, and have fun- then it's totally worthwhile.

I'm working on something about high school musicals. (Exciting, I know. STFU.) So I went to Deer Valley High, and hung out for an hour and a half before show time. I had a rediculously fun time, once I got out of the clutches of the "student director". Lovely girl, I'm sure, but her role basically equates to professional teacher's pet. I let her introduce me to the lead actors and actresses, then shooed her away.

I got my quotes and took mugs of the main kids. Took a few action shots with them playing on stage.

And there was a pit! Matt's mentioned the pit, from his band days. I didn't go down, even though I really wanted too.

Then I realized I had time to kill, so I went free-range. I skulked around the back, and stumbled upon a group of four cast members comparing their music libraries on ipods and a white MacBook. I strolled up to them, casually as I could.

"You there. Talk to me."

The sixteen-year-olds Jake, Josh, and Vincent looked up. (The fourth was entirely too into his tunes...) Basically, I chatted them up. They were hilarious. First lag in the conversation, I went for the throat.

"So, Jake. I see you've chosen to sport the Man-scara. That's a bold choice." He turned red under his cakey stage makeup, and the other two started in with the teasing. Choice stuff, there, and I'm sure I have it recorded. I'll have a lot of fun with these notes.

I whipped out my camera to take mugshots of the kids, which instantaneously blew Jake's mind.

"Wait! Wait. This is going to be in the paper?"
"Yes. I told you. (pointing to notebook.) Reporter."
"What paper?"
"The Arizona Republic."
"The big one," added Vincent.
"My picture's going to be in the paper?"
"Yeah. If I can use your quotes in a mugrail, then it'll go in with your picture. Let's just hope you said something interesting," I said.

I got shots of all of them. Group shots, action shots, silly shots (there's a money shot, too, but I'm not making that joke. I'm a professional.)So, it was fun. And I think it just made me realize that I like boys. I said it yesterday, after I had that great interview with the nine-year-old, but man. It's true. And I can compare this to the girls, because after I left my little friends, I went to hang out in the girls dressing room.

The scene: hairspray, dresses askance, purses and bags and heels and ribbons, everywhere. Six girls are huddled close to a full length mirror, carefully curling ringlets. There's a bag of honey combs at my feet.

"It's nice to see you girls snacking healthfully," I started. I didn't get a laugh, and the conversation didn't get much more inspiring. The two girls I talked two (and I'll give one credit, she was quite articulate.) were nice enough. Their story: I'm a dancer. I've been dancing since I was eight. I'm dancing in this musical because my dance teacher suggested I do it. My favorite part is (shock) the dancing.

I tried talking to three of the girls with no-name roles, with similar results. So I settled in to observe, hoping the scene might inspire some kind of artsy lede.

Then the room got quiet.

"Who are you?" demanded a blonde in a blue track suit.

"Reporter. Arizona Republic." I pointed to my badge.

"Oh." (As I had now been identified, and no longer posed a threat to this young Queen Bee, she lost interest in me. The silence hung, so I used it.)

"So, ladies. Tell me. What does that last minute before show time feel like?" I make a flippant gesture to my small audience. "Everyone. Answer. Ready, set, go."

It worked. All (must have been... eleven of them) Start shouting adjectives at me, telling me little pieces of their story. You can guess what they said; I've yet to have the vocabulary of a sixteen year old dancer inspire me. I hear, I scribble. Chaos, busy, hectic, the boys walk in, drama, cat fights, nervousness, excitement, lots of curling irons going, music, the boys dressing room is across the hall, we play, etc... I picked out a few girls to actually listen to, and let the gaggle slip back to their previously scheduled gossip machining.

I am the trained observer, I am the fly on the wall.

Our Blue Queen notices me again. "Hey. Reporter. How old are you?"

Apparently, not so much.

"20. Wait. 21."

"Oh. My. Gosh." (Seriously, you can hear the punctuation in her voice.) "That's in-credible!"

"... Thanks?"

"I thought you were our age. You look 16. I thought you were from the school paper."

Another girl joins in: "No, no, no. She looks 25. At least."

"No, you look young. I can't believe you're a reporter! You're so young." I didn't correct her on the not-technically-a-reporter-reporter thing. It would have added layers of confusion that might have put her off her dancing-game for the night's performance. "What do you write?"

"Education stories. Local stuff."

"Wow. Wow. I want to be a journalist, too, you know."

"Neat. Do you write for your school's paper?"

"No... I'm not that into writing, you know? I want to go broadcast. That's still journalism, you know."

"Yeah. I know." (Hiss. You will be a talking head that thinks no original thought. You will be the voice that tells me the current highs, lows, and accidents on our Valley's freeways. You will narrate images of squirrels on skis. Even then, that's only IF you apply yourself. I loathe you.

"Are you going into broadcast too?"

"No. I'm a print major. I want to cover Superior Court one day."

"Oh," the Blue Queen's eyes glaze a bit. Another girl joins in.

"I'm going to be a broadcast reporter, too. I'll cover fashion and the red carpet." The brunette's pink sports bottle is instantly transformed into microphone, now angled into Queenie's face. "Brad! Brad! Over here. Who are you wearing and where is Angelina this week?"

The girls giggle. I try join in.

"More importantly, whom will she be adopting this week?"

I think I got a pitty laugh.

MCR is teh 4w350|V|357 3v3r

2007-03-09T07:47:00.000-08:00

Concert's tonight! Excited.

Went over to Rachel's last night to chat. Talked a bit. Was fun. Esther made me a cheese crisp. Tasty.

And then we played dress up. Only, emo dress up. Wigs and loud makeup. My favorite part? Rachel finished doing blue eyeshadow, and Esther says, "Hey, you know who you look like? Tammy Fay Baker." It's so true. :D Still mega excited though. And I'm really liking my black nail polish.

Anyway, left Rach's and didn't get home and in bed till one a.m. And I still had to be at work at 8, and get as much emo hair prep donea s I could, so all in all, I got 4.5 hours of sleep. I feel like crap, but still. As of right now, it's working for me. I'm running on a little bit of excited and hyper energy. Tonight, though, I'm pretty confident I'm going to crash hard.

More details of the concert to come, sometime after I get some sleep.

2 steps forward...

2007-03-05T20:24:00.000-08:00

Dearest blog readers-

Someone I know and heart taught me some freak-out code the other day. He probably shouldn't have done that.

S, m m d t t m a. A s d a t h a p w t. N, n e t. S d e s t n, w m i e w. A d i s c u w w s l... i f r a. A R i p a, a i d k w i c d a t. I d k. I d k w t d. S i l, a t p t I r k a t, t l m. A I d t t n p, a m a i l t. I r l M. R, r d. M e l h, w i s o a w d l. B i l, t s f, t s b. I g n, f. A i d k w t d.

Suck it, bitches.

Alice

Burninate the hissing herpes whore

2007-02-21T21:14:00.000-08:00

So, here's my big plans for my birthday weekend.

Friday: Work. Until 4:30, or 6. Depending on A) how much work I get done in the morning, B) my mood, C) if anything to entertain happens, that I'd rather be doing that pretending to care about answering phones.

After work: Drinking. At Hooters. Or Mis Amigoes. Conveniently located right next to my office, since most of the people that are comming will be right there anyway. Have EXCELLENT time, drama free. Anyone else is most certainly welcome.

Get drunk, make Head drive me around, should we end up anywhere else.

Saturday: Wake up, hopefully without a hangover. Or, enjoy first hangover ever. Try really hard not to be a bitch. Drive home, stop for pedicure. Take mom grocery shopping for Sunday's party. Clean house. Prep food. Hopefully, church at 5 p.m. in case I don't feel well enough on Sunday morning.

Saturday half-time show: Dinner, potentially, with the Grandparents. Be civil. Try not to kill, scream, hate, or be generally unpleasant. No running away.

Saturday night: More drinking, with friends, close to home. Yard House brewery. Make Cassie drive me. Or someone. Not sure, better talk that one out soon. Have good time with all involved. Make someone sing me happy birthday. Shuuuuunnnn... shun the non believers.

Sunday morning: Hopefully, I already went to church. If not, 9 a.m. service, because, damn. I'm dedicated. Have breakfast at home: oatmeal. (Mm, tasty) Oh, forgot the coffee. Yes. No, wait, better: Make mom make me oatmeal, serve it with candles, and sing to me. Then get me a cup of coffee. Continue cleaning, burn music DVD, make sure it works, set up stereo upstairs, learn the name of Randy's girlfriend (No, really get it down. Must be welcoming) Read design chapter on whatever Stewie Bootie said the homework was. Call nice grandma, like you said you would, cause your a good granddaughter.

Saturday night: Party. Friends, family. Righteous good times to be had. Sleep.

This is how it is going to be. Because it's MY weekend, and I said so.

All you need is...

2007-02-17T12:40:00.000-08:00

So, I had to turn music on, at my desk. Loudly. Because I'm falling asleep reading Penny Arcade. And while there's really no one here to stop me, it just feels wrong.

Side note: +44. Seriously, someone has to have broken down and bought it by now. And it ain't gonna be me. (I'll be there when your heart stops beating!)

Additional side note: I have a night off, so maybe I can steal Cassie's music tonight. Sweet.

Okay, back to it.

I promised I would blog about my conversation with Dad the other night. So here goes.

I left work at 6, and because traffic sucked, I made it home a little after 7. Just in time to pick up Dad. We had to run an errand for mom (needed a white labcoat), so I put on some Beatles and started driving.

"What are you doing on the 23rd?" Dad asked.
"Drinking. Hard."
"Well, your grandparents want to have dinner with you then," he explained.
"Well, unless they're down for having dinner at The Library on Mill, I think they'd best not plan on it." Dad looked a little sad after that, so I tried to tone down my sarcasm. "They'll be here on the 24th, right? I can have dinner with them then."

Apparently, David is scheduled for dinner on the 24th. And they leave on the 25th, while I'm working in the morning. My response? "Well, tell them it was great seeing them. Maybe I'll catch them next time there's some rare pigeon flying through California."

Which did not go over well, either. Dad's getting quieter and quieter, which was not the effect I was going for. I flipped through to I Am the Walrus, in case it would cheer him up. It didn't work.

So after awhile, I ask him if I did something wrong. And Dad, being Dad, being the best person I know, proceeds to break it down for me.

He told me, in essence, that he'd done the same thing I'm doing now with his dad (*).
He grew up mad at his father, mostly because of the ridiculous standards Grandpa had for him, feeling like he would never be able to match those expectations. So he tried to kill his relationship with his father. Just sort of cut it off for a while.

(*Note: Like father, like daughter.)

And he said that when he grew up, he learned that all that did was cause pain and waste time. Time that he could have used in a relationship, he spent being angry over small things that didn't really matter in the end anyway. So he stopped, and started doing what he could to repair his relationship with Grandpa.

But, he said, there's all sorts of things he can't go back and do again. Like Margaret. He can't go back and talk to (my great) Grandma Margaret. Or talk to Poppy again.

(Backstory: Poppy is Dad's grandfather. My great grandfather. Poppy came from Italy, held dual citizenship in Portugal (or something) immigrated here, set up a tile business in Galveston, married Margaret, lived a good life, until he died. Of a heart attack, I think. Poppy is my dad's hero. The best man my dad ever knew, he says. Says often, that he learned more about being a man from Poppy than he ever did from his dad. "Peter could kill himself with a screwdriver," he says)

(So this is where Dad gets the man-tears. And goes slightly off topic. I think he was just feeling a little emotional, and it all ran together)

He'll never be able to introduce me to Poppy, to show him how proud he is of me. To show him one of my articles.

He tells me he understands why I'm angry at the grandparents, and that I have every right to be. That I'm old enough to tell them where to stick it, and I no longer have to arrange my life for them. It's my decision now, and he'll support whatever it is I decide to do. That he no longer has the power to command an audience for them, and if David can't switch for Friday, he'll tell them so.

"But just don't look down on me for trying," he said.

I don't. I couldn't, ever.

The whole night made made me feel ... something. Not bad, really. More self-aware.

Again, it's me being mad at them, and killing the relationship as a result. I've gotten so angry over all the things they did and didn't do when I was little, that somewhere along the way, I just decided it would be less emotionally draining to just not care. Sort of like what happened with David.

I'm holding tight to my anger, and it works for me. But I hate that it kills Dad. Because I can see that he'd love us to be ... not a perfect, nuclear family... but I know the distance between us all grates on him. And Dad, wanting to be a hero and a provider, and a man that wants to fix something when it's broken, feels obligated to help facilitate the relationship. So he's stuck, trying to deal with the ridiculous actions of his parents, and trying to deal with me, being young and angry.

Basically, I haven't made up my mind as to what to do. Likely, when we have dinner, I'll continue to be polite yet distant. A perfect example of grace and civility. Because that's what I've been for years, with them. Always, I think. Maybe not when I was a baby, but that hardly counts. Course, I'll admit the interactions are entirely of my own construction now... But don't want a relationship with them at this point. I want them to stop trying. Or stop pretending to try.

Anyway, the conversation wound down for a bit, until Dad mentioned that he'd been to overprotective of me, and that's he's trying to work on getting over that. And that if I wanted to have Waffles over on the 25th, I could. He'd be happy to meet him. It was sweet.

And, when it's all said and done, let me also mention (specifically, to Rachel, since she's the only one I haven't told yet) Dad got his promotion. The ceremony will be on the 23rd, I think. Want to come?

Time for The Quantify Alice's Mood Game

2007-02-12T22:38:00.000-08:00

(All numbers are out of 10. Ten equals awesomeness. Rock-fucking-tits. Stellar. Driving fast with Time is running out on. One, equals I want to crawl into a ball and cry/sleep.)

And, begin:

Start off with being late to editing class. Which I hate. And pair that with heels, so it's all click-clacking obvious that I'm late. (At a 2)

Chat with Matt during class. Add one point. (At a 3)

Leave class, catch shuttle to Lot 59, where I found NO parking tickets. No point change on that one, but I do love getting away with illegal cross-parking.

Drive fast (+.5) to work (-.5). Check emails, searching for a response from PUHSD or Deer Valley. No responses, the bastards. (Still at a three)

Schedule photo assignment for tomorrow morning (Relief: +2.) Realize you'll have to go as well, and take headshots for your comment rail (-1). Realize that means skipping class (-2). Realize that means extra time, so you can skip out of work early on Friday (+1). (Score: 3)

Sneak Matt out for lunch. (Woot! +6) Find cool new lunch shop, have tasty sandwich and good time with Matt. (Total during lunch: 10)

Realize I talked myself into a corner, and now have to watch Buffy (-2). But kisses make it better (+2). (I can handle the Buffy. I can. I can. "I must not run away".)

Take call from PIO, who does not have the information she'd promised me (-3).

Return Matt to work (sigh: -2)

Drive to ASU West, for Mexico class. Email various professors, type out some notes. (Productivity: +1)

In class: Horribly horribly bored (-3). Start reading Penny Arcade comics (+2).

(FYI, we're atabouta 5)

Leave class. Drive towards home in traffic (-1).

Call Cassie. Finally hear new E/Cas drama (Sweetness: +1).

Perchance to think about stoping at Verizon to fix my phone. I hate Verizon, so that sucks, but with a fixed phone, I can snap a picture of Stewie Bootie's ... bootie, and earn $5. I called Dad to meet me there, since they typically won't deign to look at me if I'm not the account holder.

Wait for Dad. Find DVDs on sale at OfficeMax, and new colors of permanent markers. (The inner pen-whore is happy: +3)

Annoyed that Dad is late, I sign myself in and have my phone looked at. The Verizon chick (and seriously, there's no way that girl could be anything other than a reformed meth addict) says she can fix it in 20 minutes. I walk outside. Dad and Randy finally arrive.

Now that I've established that I don't need him at the moment, I send them off and head around the corner to my favorite chinese food place. (Pending moo goo gai pan: +1)

Enjoy the presence of the woman who owns the restaurant. Such SUCH a bitch, to EVERYONE. God, I love her. Order, pay up. Think, "Oh, I have 20 minutes to burn. I can start making that playlist for Matt, since I'm literally carrying the DVDs onto which I had planned to burn, and markers to label them. Joy, and joyness."

(We're rocking a 9 right about now. Prospect of dinner, fixed phone, and music = good mood.)

Get to car. Open passenger side door.

...

Do not see laptop. (-5, taking us down to 4)

Search car. Frantically. Back seat, front seats, truck, under seats. Under mats (even thought that's patently ridiculous). No lappy. (-3,452)

...

(Inner dialouge: Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck- How did you lose your laptp? - fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck - Such a looser. Such a fuck up. It was right freaking there! No broken glass, nothing else taken. Idiot child! The car door was probably still unlocked, from earlier. You are too freaking stupid to live. You need a personal assistant to keep track of things like this. No, fuck that. You need a nanny. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck, Mom is going to kill you. Mom will rip out your beating heart, and smack you in the face with it. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. Who do I call? Police? Dad? Police? Dad? Which first? Which is worse? fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. Now you're pretty much going to have to run away and live on the streets, hobo style. Nice going , Slick. GODDAMITSONOFABITCH. fuckfuckfuckfuck. Oh, this is amusing. I don't even have a phone to call anyone right now. I'm totally adrift from human contact. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. I really liked that desktop, the cherry blossoms. Fuckfuckfuckfuck. You suck, you know? So freaking irresponsible.)

(That's pretty much how it goes when I lose things. Think, complete pit of despair, and you'd be close)

*

Current score: -3,448.

*

Run into Verizon store, demand phone back. Call Dad. Tell Dad. Get annoyed, because while asking questions, he's clearly not as shocked, appalled, pissed off, frustrated and depressed as I am. He tells me to call Mom.

Mom tells me Dad took it out of my car, because I did, in fact, leave it on the passenger seat with the door unlocked. Which is pretty stupid. (Feel immense wave of relief: +3,448)

Call Dad. Tell him I know what he did, and why he let me freak out. (Gotta teach that girl a lesson, and all) Suddenly become really tired.

(Score at this point: 0. I might as well be asleep, because I could give a fuck less at this point)

Collect new cell phone from Verizon. (+2) Return to Chinese food place, have the bitchy owner woman glare at me and say, "I thought you said it was for here." My dinner is now cold. I take it to go.

At home, now. Eat, text Cassie, play with phone. (Put Oh! Valencia on as ringer. +2)

Realize I had planed to meet Rachel at gym. Change quickly, head out again.

At gym. Enjoy gym. Leave gym. Sing Possum Kingdom loudly in the parking lot, no doubt due to influx of energy. Attempt to sing the following songs: Help, Tear You Apart, Hate, So Damn Clever, I am the Walrus, Drive My Car. Suck at all, loudly, yet with passion. (+2)

(Missing the days of the all night Alice's Car Dance Parties, I'm rocking a solid 6.)

Drive home, loudly and quickly. Put on Muse. (+3)

Almost get killed by a truck cutting across three lanes of traffic. (Lived to see another day: +1)

Now hyper, and just parked outside my house, I get sweet text message from Matt. I call. I chat, and walk backwards while staring at the sky in the middle of the street. It's lovely.

Chat for hours. Make playlists. Listen to songs that make me go, "hell yeah". Decide that Myxomatosis is awesome. Decide to update blog, in strange, candyland-like boardgame style. Think, I'm freaking tired, and it's 12:40 at night. Remember assignment's at 8:55 tomorrow, Sunnyslope High. (The threat of responsibilities takes the mood notch down a bit. I'll say goodnight at about... a 7)

Wherein I get a bad idea

2007-02-07T08:47:00.000-08:00

Two things:

1. Testing out a new lucky rubber band. It's a pink osterich.

2. I'm probably going to drop Kelly's class today. We'll see how that goes.

And on to more interesting matters:

I had so much fun last night! Here's a pic of Rach's naughty bits:

More to come, at lunch. Kisses.

A broken heart

2007-02-04T19:02:00.000-08:00

I rooted for you, and you lost. Damn you, Bears. Even if you all still get $42,000 checks.

You suck.

Sincerely,

Alice the Bandwagon Fan

Incandescently happy

2007-02-04T16:53:00.000-08:00

Hi.

Long time, no post, eh? Sorry. Busy week.

Matt and I have finally thrown caution to the wind, and since Monday, I've been his Sugarpants and he's my ______. (I'm still working on a nickname for him ;)

It's great. I'm incredibly happy, even though I still worry because it's an office romance. And we have two ways of getting caught. Well, three- 1) Matt's roomate, who is well connected (and handy) 2) Amanda, who is quite excited and not very good at talking in code and doesn't see the need for discretion, or, secret option #3- we get caught because we're both smiling like idiots and chatting with each other all day.

::sigh:: It's nice. It's great, really. At risk of sounding silly, I'll say I'm happyhappyhapyhappy.

(WTF? Cassie just texted me, saying she went to a psychic who told her she was a painter in a previous life, and she'll change careers to be a musician later in life, and be fabulously wealthy... oh lord.)

Back to it. This mostly fabulous week has had some downsides. One, no sleep. And crappy sleep when I steal some. Oh, and I skipped food everyday. And the transcription project from Hell for Mr. Angles at work. Bastard.

Right now, just about everything on me aches. But I'll get over myself soon. Hopefully someone will feed me dinner, cause there's no way I'm going to get it. Or make it. We'll see.

And today? Superbowl. GO BEARS! Looks like my Bears have good defense tonight, but as of right now, we're down two. And both sides keep fumbling, not sure what's up with that. I thought that was pretty basic, something you learn in day one of football camp: don't drop the ball. But who knows, they're probably all nervous, so I'll give them some slack.

Questions I have that I want answered:

1. Where is the marching band from? NFL teams don't have bands. Is that the state college band, or something? The specific superbowl band?

2. Did Prince just sing a Foo Fighters cover? Or did the Foo steal it first, like Little Nikki? Hmm...

3. The play in the rain? I looks like it's raining pretty hard. Would they cancel the Superbowl because of rain? I wonder.

A weekend well done

2007-01-28T16:54:00.000-08:00

Friday was awesome. Saturday was awesome. And today? Today was awesome.

It didn't start awesome, though. Rachel woke me up with an eight a.m. text message, telling me she was too sick for church at nine. Since I wasn't feeling great anyway, I turned my alarm off thirty minutes early, and sleepily read through a few more pages in AHWOASG.

I finally climbed out of bed at 11 a.m. I Zelda'd for a bit, backtracking to the Goron Temple to reclaim a piece of heart I missed, and beating the Star Game II to get the large quiver (100 arrows). (I'm prepping to start the Cave of Ordeals. It's every bit as arduous as it sounds.)

Then it was lunchtime, and time to make a decision about my day. Typically, I like spending Sunday at home, being lazy-ish, cleaning, laundry, organizing music or reading books. Generally, alone.

But I've also not seen Cassie in about two weeks. And I've been getting mad myspace and text messages, to the effect that we need to hang. So I sacrificed my lazy Sunday for an outing with Cassie. Easily, best decision I've made this week.

Lunch, at the Pick Up Sticks. Caught up on my Wildflower drama, Ally and Ally's tumor, quick mention of Esther, Cassie's family, (forgot to ask about her his-em though...). Talked about music, movies, birthdays (reached a rather cool decision about my 6-day celebration in February. One word: Sign-up list of activities. Well, not one word, but you get the point). Generally, chatted it up.

Then I took Cassie to Westgate, to check it out. And we have proclaimed it awesome. It has a dancing fountain, which is not really as lame as it sounds. Chatted some more, people watched, shared some chocolates and enjoyed Coffee Plantation drinks, and generally enjoyed life. Not to mention, if you were alive in the state of Arizona today, you'll agree: perfect weather.

I have three favorite things about Cassie. One, is that she's generally so passive I get away with imposing my will whenever I want. Me gusta.

Two, she laughs at all of my jokes. All of them. Even the lame ones.

Three, she likes The Beatles. Her favorite song? I want to hold your hand. :) Which fits in perfectly, because on my mix, it goes: Eleanor Rigby --> I am the Walrus --> I Want to Hold Your Hand. So, my favorite, my favorite, her favorite. Then I have to skip down to Yesterday.

But today, Cassie gets a perfect 10, which should last until she goes crazy on me next time. Which, hopefully, won't be for a while. ::Fingers crossed::

P.S., picked a new perfume today. I'm going to run it by my peeps to make sure no one hates it. (I'm considerate, I am. I mean, Esther's DKNY makes me gag. And so does Cassie's Paris Hilton crap. So I don't want to do that to anyone.

P.S.S., (Or is it P.P.S.?) Hey, you. What are we doing for Esther's birthday/ what did you get her/ what should I/ how old is she again?

Brad, and what Brad put in his pants

2007-01-27T21:04:00.000-08:00

'Twas a Saturday well done.

First, worksies. Well, if we're going to be technical, I didn't end Friday night until 3 a.m. today. But anyway: worksies.

Felt productive, though I'm sure I wasn't. I watched four hours of my online class at my desk (remember the personality thing a week ago? Well, turns out there's only one other person like me in the class. Out of the hundred that did the homework anyway) I did my editing homework, had a delicious lunch and read more in AHWOASG, returned only slightly unwillingly and certainly late, and finished the Council meeting minutes.

Then, it was date time. Oh yeah.

Amanda and I have been planning this date for a while now. And I couldn't get out of it this time. So I drove to her little love shack in Tempe, where she is in fact, living in sin with Brad (the Apostle of Humility). Met Brad. Met roomate. Collected Amanda, and went to My Big Fat Greek Restaurant. Which is one of Amanda's favorites.

Brad looks exactly like Brad does in pictures. (Astute, right?) Brad is charming, funny, energetic, silly, and has the coolest belt buckle ever. (Matt needs one of those). So, in short, he's pretty much a perfect fit for Amanda, and more importantly, they really seem happy. (I'd use that damned L-word, but it's caused such drama lately...)

At dinner (As a Pro-Vegger, and not a meat-a-holic, I had a veggie wrap and salad. Quite tasty) Amanda and I talked. Talked. Naw... we talked it up. Dug deep into the trenches of conversation.

Obviously, that same silly topic popped up (damn you all) which was thoroughly discussed, which fed into a conversation in which I told Mandy about Dan the Man, and my tendency to sabotage. Which Amanda gets, because Amanda did that in her pre-Brad days.

I cannot even explain how much Amanda and I have in common. It's a lot. A lotlot. And she's a good listener. So, if you figure that Amanda gets my sabotaging nature (not necessarily approve, but gets) and shares the Wal-Mart/hobo dream...

We also share a love of Urban Outfitters. We browsed, giggled and chatted, squealed over awesome housewares, had some bitch step to Amanda and tell her long sleeves are over in February in a disdain-filled voice but that's okay cause she was alone anyway and shouldn't have been eavesdropping if she didn't want it pointed out for her, and ended up with new clutch purses.

And rocked it back to her place, blaring Muse's Time is Running Out, because it's completely sexy for some reason. Back to her place for a mini-party with a magnum from Four Peaks.

So, Amanda is a perfect ten, and Brad, I'll give... an 8. But then there's Brad's friends.

I can basically explain it like this: Brad is easily the coolest one. And I'll try not to get too harsh, because I'm sure Amanda's going to read this at some point, but ... damn. First, there's Ben. If I had my choice of watching paint dry or Ben make conversation, I'd go with the former. Hell, I'd actually watch all those Hoff clips on IamBetterthanU.com (man-crush much?) before engaging Ben in conversation.

And then there's Thad. If you've ever wondered what happens when you mix a nerd with douche, and add a receding hairline, you get Thad. Here's a list of things I learned about Thad, from Thad, and my internal response:

1. Thad tried out for Jeopardy twice. And lost. (Not impressed, Thad.)
2. Thad reads mAHn-gAH. And that's how we're supposed to say it. (Eat a dick, Thad.)
3. Thad says things like, "I have the biggest calculator in the room. And yes, that is a euphemism." (::shudder::)
4. Thad lives 30 miles from Brad. I live about 30 miles from Brad. I hope to God he's on the other side, and right now, there's 60 miles between us.
5. Thad likes the Warcraft. Probably, too much. There were a few references to "Plus 10 belts of something-or-other" thrown around.

Anyway, despite that, it was still fun. Funny, nerdy boys and really ugly cats. Brad and I had mini-bike sex; took suggestive pictures with grapefruit; could not escape the Radiohead, and rocked the Toadies; hit the Magnum; met the Foot Vagina and the Cactus formerly known as Brokeback Cactus; and scored a copy of someone's Best of Muse mix and Albert Hammond, Jr.

Left, because I was mostly tired, drove home with OK Computer, and decided I need a new Radiohead album.

Now I'm here, rocking White Unicorn (Sister, can you tell me when the day turns to night?), about to read more AHWOASG. Breathless with anticipation.

Amanda and I decided that we'll be having a third date soon, and I can't sabotage my love for her by canceling all of our plans. Because we're committed, now. And I may have gotten her pregnant.

A Gem, from Boring Ben: "Maybe it's dye. Do you wanna dye? D-Y-E. Heh heh heh."

I believe in a thing called love

2007-01-25T22:48:00.000-08:00

To Rachel: No.

I'll have to 'splain that tomorrow. Cept for this quote:

"What do you mean, if we both liked chicks? If we both liked chicks, I'd still love guys. I love cock."

-Rachel the Whore, 11:10 p.m.

I am NOT a watermelon!

2007-01-23T16:38:00.000-08:00

DAMN IT!

I'm not a watermelon. I am NOT a watermelon!!!!

I'm a mango! MANGO!

(Now, a little back story.)

A while back, Rach and I decided to assign all of our friends fruits that correspond to their various personality traits. Rachel was black cherry, I was a mango, Esther was kiwi... I don't remember the rest. But yeah. There you go.

So I'm visiting Rachel tonight, taking the shots we're going to use to make Jeff, of Iambetterthanu.com, some fan mail. Idly playing word games that have no clear winner. (PS, you're right, it's elephantiasis. Your point). When Rachel says,

"You're not really a mango anymore. You're watermelon."

What the hell? I asked her to explain. Apparently, I stopped being mango when I left the Wildflower.

So, let's examine this. First, a mango.

Mangoes are:

-Fun
-Colorful
-Spicy and sweet
-Exotic
-One of the cooler fruits, that go into only the best fruit salads
-Excellent for drinkies
-If mangoes could talk, it would be in spanish
-And I'm sure they'd say, "F' you" all the time
-A citrus (I think. Tastes that way)

And, contrast that with the watermelon:

-Green on the outside (Green in that negative way)
-Hard on the outside
-Fragile
-Pink on the inside
-Sweet, but bland
-Generic
-Black parts on the inside
-Boring

So why am I a watermelon now? Very unpleasant news. So I've resolved to reclaim my mango glory days, and I have a special plan of attack to do so. But I won't reveal it all now, lest I be foiled by the man trying to keep me down.

However, if you'd like to be a little more specific about how I've gone watery, Rachel the Whore, please do.

ENTP and Electioneering

2007-01-22T14:02:00.000-08:00

So, I had homework due on Friday, for my Media Research Methods class. Which I didn't discover until Saturday. But it was ungraded, so I didn't care too much. (Ungraded exercise, especially this one, = waste of time.)

The assignment? Take a version of the Briggs-Meyers personality test. And report on the findings. (The test, in a shorter, probably weaker version, is available at www.humanmetrics.com)

I'm an ENTP. But only slightly so. Here are my results:

Your Type is

ENTP

Extroverted Intuitive Thinking Perceiving

Strength of the preferences %

11 25 25 11

From the description page: "Clever" is the word that describes ENTPs best. ...
ENTPs are usually verbally as well as cerebrally quick, and generally love to argue... Both at work and play, ENTPs are very fond of 'toys'... They tend to be extremely genial, if not charming, when not being harassed by life in general.

Also, for all my fans out there: "In terms of relationships with others, ENTPs are capable of bonding very closely and suddenly with their loved ones. Some appear to be deceptively offhand with their nearest and dearest... ENTPs are also good at acquiring friends who are (almost*) as clever as they are."

* helping to clarify. :)

!!! Christ, it's like there's no warm spots on campus. I moved over from the cafeteria because I was cold, and nearer to the sun, and I'm still cold.

Anyway, back to the personality profile. I guess I do agree; I also like that I came out at only 11% more extroverted. Because I'm a little extroverted, but I also like being alone.

So, even though I didn't do it on time, I still *did* my homework. So, nya nya. It's not like I was getting points for it anyway.

Oh, and Electioneering. It's officially my favorite Radiohead song. But that's out of like, the 12 I've heard and the four or five I can name. Lyrics:

I will stop, I will stop at nothing.
Say the right things when electioneering
I trust I can rely on your vote.

When I go forwards you go backwards
and somewhere we will meet.
When I go forwards you go backwards
and somewhere we will meet.
Ha ha ha

Riot shields, voodoo economics,
it's just business, cattle prods and the I.M.F.
I trust I can rely on your vote.

When I go forwards you go backwards
and somewhere we will meet.
When I go forwards you go backwards
and somewhere we will meet.

(Care of Greenplastic.com)

Gotta love a song that references the IMF.

It's coooold out.

Smells like wildflowers and shame

2007-01-18T21:57:00.000-08:00

Let's get this out of the way, shall we?

Top Five things you probably don't know about Alice

1.

...

GODDAMIT. I lost the list I made earlier. Grrr. Now I have to reconstruct it. Particularly annoying, since I'm sure it had something interesting on it... Oh well. Here's five more things I just thought up.

1. Though the name has faded from oral history, my scheme for cheating on a biology exam in high school is legend. It was a ninth grade test on the periodic table, and I hadn't studied a bit. So I took an aquafina bottle, found a blue note card, wrote out what I would need, slid the note card under the label, and kept it out of the table in front of me during the exam. I could peep over the edge and read what I needed.
Now, brilliant as that was, I still got caught. Which sucked. But I knew, right then and there, that the perodic table and I would never be friends, and have since avoided chemistry and biology like the plague.

Back to the story: By the end of that day, a mere three periods later, the entire school knew about it. Everyone. I got applause, handshakes, the whole shebang. Didn't stop there. The next day, every teacher at the school knew. I was WATCHED during every exam in bio after that, and most of my other teachers made jokes about it during exam times. Still didn't stop there. I found out teachers in other schools knew about it, when Rachel's mom, a kindergarten teacher in a school in another city and another school district, told Rachel the story of my cheating episode, who said, yeah. That was Rachel. (Something like that, anyway. As Rachel says, I have the memory of a goldfish)

2. I skipped the seventh grade. And hated every freaking minute of it. See, Mummy and Daddy got the brilliant idea that me being smarter than every other kid in my grade meant I should be moved up. I took the stand that being smarter merely meant I was supposed to never study, do my homework on the bus in the morning, and get perfect scores, making more time for my social life (chatting and passing notes). Their argument for the move being, if I'm not challenged, I'm wasting potential brilliance. (Crap, btw) Unfortunately, my middle school principal agreed.

So while I was supposed to be in some class or another, I was visiting some friends on the field, when one of the office secretaries came out to find me in the early afternoon. I thought I was in trouble for ditching class, so I didn't say much when she hauled me into the principal's office. Course, we were joined shortly by my parents, and the three proceeded to tell me their grand plan for moving me. To which my response was: "Fuck this. You can't do this. Fuck you." I swore like nothing else. Would have made a sailor blush. (Always having extra time and my free-range nature meant I got to know some of the coolest people at school. And their equally cool vocabulary.)

But in the end, it didn't help. I was moved, and everyone hated me. EVERYONE. Not even exaggerating. Okay, a couple people didn't. But I can say the entirety of the eight grade did, and at least 97% of the seventh grade did. Bitter much? Naw...

3. I'm allergic to metal. Specifically nickel, but I've encountered enough nickel-free items to be cautious of most other metallic things. As a result, I don't wear a whole lot of jewelry, and most of my watches have leather or plastic bands.

4. I like sappy romantic movies. It's sooo embarrassing. Kate and Leopold, You've Got Mail, Runaway Bride, Pride and Predjudice, Stranger than fiction, Love Actually, 10 Things I hate about you, Roman Holiday... Yeah. It's really bad. I know. There's two, though, that I hate- The Notebook and Sleepless in Seattle. Those sucked.

5. And, lastly, since I was considering blogging this anyway... I got a ticket this morning. On the 10. For driving in the HOV lane at 8:40 in the morning. Sucked. Which spun me into a whole mini-depression until about lunch. So, naturally, I skipped class. Perfect class-skipping mood. Which compounded it, so I threw Revis on my ipod and let the mood take me. I thought I was doing okay and working through it, except that when I got to work (an hour early) Amanda cornered me within 30 seconds. "What's wrong? What? What is it? Tell me. Tell me. What? Is it bad? Tell me. What happened."

Me: "Nope. It's nothing."

Amanda: "What? Tell me. What? Family? School? What. Tell me. Sametime?"

So I told her. Good thing, and bad thing, at the same time. I like telling Amanda things. She's a good listener. But still, I didn't really want to share. And I also don't like the fact that she picked up on it right away. Dunno.

It's late. G'night.

(P.s., blog title = old spice commercial. Funny, funny)

My favorite barista, my least favorite historian, and a show somewhere in the middle

2007-01-16T20:03:00.000-08:00

I'm getting sick. So to all my readers, please restrain from making out with me this week. Sorry to do this to you. Also, my throat kinda hurts, so if you could restrain from attempting to murder me, that'd be great. I'm not sure I'm up to screaming for m y life right now.

I visited Rach at her new job tonight. The Java City one. She made me my vanilla latte, and despite a complete lack of foam, it was tasty. I proclaim her my favorite barista.

I ate some soup, felt a little better. And watched Veronica Mars. Now, as best I can tell, it was the last episode before the winter break. The one where Miss Veronica catches the head-shaving rapist. It definitely had some laughably silly parts, but here's the highlights: A) Someone gets stabbed with a unicorn, and B) The ex, Logan, is hot. And he beats a police cruiser with a bat, just so he can spend the night in jail to kick some ass. Anyway, looks like new episodes start next week, so if next week falls through like tonight did, and there's no House, I might watch it.

My first class went well this morning, thanks for asking. It's Introduction to Political Philosophies. The professor is an extremely old and bald man. He has a teaching assistant who looks like my worst idea of a grown-up trekkie. Thick glasses with Fender frames, plaid shirt, overgrown beard. Anyway, the class is right by the Flash route, so it's a quick walk. Also, the room itself was perfectly lit. Which is a wierd thing to note, I'm sure, except that at 9:15 in the morning, it impressed me.

Josh Bernstein is on the Daily Show. I'm not a fan of Josh Bernstein. As a matter of fact, it annoys me that I even know who he is. Damn you, Josh. You'll never be as cool as Indy.

If I fall off the edge juuuust right...

2007-01-15T21:40:00.000-08:00

I played Zelda alllll day today. Well, not all day, but most of it. Quite uneventful, I tell you what.

(I'm watching South Park right now- the one where Cartman goes on the Maury show as an out of control teen)

But Rachel told me to post, and I do try to obey her in all things ...

"I don't go to school, and I kill people. Whatever. I do what I want."

Yeah. I'm not really thinking about anything, so that makes it hard to post something... tsk, tsk...

My first class of the semester is tomorrow. It's intorduction to political philiosophies or something. I think it's a 100-level course, and if I remember correctly, I'm only taking because it's a requirement for my minor. Or something.

Now it's Scrubs. Damn. I hope something falls on the remote, hitting the power button perfectly, so I can go to bed.

Let's see if that works.

P.S., Cellar Door.

Held together by a blue, elephant shaped rubber band

2007-01-13T09:15:00.000-08:00

I quit the State Press. Just now. I would post the email I sent, except for the fact that I didn't save myself a copy. But I bcc'd Rach on it, anyway.

Yesterday was Day 2 of the camp. I went, and I hated it. But that's to be expected.

Yesterday was also my deadline for my Lori story. Which I had done little on (up from very, very little, the other day). So, I'm sitting in their newsroom at this silly camp, thinking the entire time, "I swear, I could so find a better use for this time." And getting progressively stressed out.

After a very long and annoying lunch-bonding session, one of the editors says to me, "Hey, we need your new story ideas soon so you can get started for your Tuesday deadline."

Tuesday meaning, three days. To put this in another context, the day after my first story for them is due. Which I've done exactly nothing on. So I lie.

"Okay. I'll send you some story ideas I've been kicking around when I get to my desk," I said, packing up my stuff.
"We also need you to file a photo request for your first story," she said.
"... I don't have anything to take a picture of. It's about sleep. Do you want me to schedule a photo of someone sleeping?"
"No, no... who have you talked to so far?"
"Two students I ran into yesterday." (Complete lie, didn't talk to anyone yet.) "But they're gone now."
"Well, what about that doctor you were going to talk to? Schedule a photo for him or her."
"Okay. Fine. I'll work that out tonight." (Also, complete lie. I had no intention of doing anything but my Lori story.)

So I leave. Run, really, the hell out of there. Upstairs at ground level, it was cold, the sky was gray, and the pavement wet from a light rain. Thoroughly depressing weather. It was about 2:45, and I headed for my car, parked illegally (according to ASU) in lot 16. I'm thinking to myself, If I just drive as fast as I can over to work, I can get it all done in time. No biggie. And tomorrow, I'll finish my sleep story. And schedule a photo. And start the next one. No biggie.

I get in my car, reach for my lucky rubber band on the dashboard, to start putting my hair in a pony tail. (It's a thoroughly female thing. Tying your hair back is like putting on the "I'm going to work now" mentality.)

It snapped.

My lucky rubber band, the blue one that's shaped like an elephant, the one that came from my Mecca, The Container Store in Texas, that I bought on vacation the last time I saw Leah, that Marcia laughed at because she thought it was a democrat rubber band but she was wrong cause it would have to be a blue donkey, the one that held my spanish notecards together during my final last semester that I kicked ass on, and lived in my car just so I could put my hair up whenever I need to kick ass and take names, snapped.

Right at it's little blue trunk.

First thought: Damn. Not my little elephant!
Second thought: I can so not do this anymore.

Since I didn't have time to wallow in my grief over the demise of my elephant rubber band, I dried my eyes on my sleeve and resumed my plan of attack: drive fast, kick ass. (It's a good plan, most of the time.)

It didn't work. Between bouts of frantic calling at work, I kept thinking 'I'm never going to get this done. I'm going to fail. I'm going to fail. I'm going to fail, die alone, drop out of school and work at wal-mart, I'm going to fail, I'm going to end up as a hobo.'

I sent Rachel an email: "i'm thinking about quitting the state press. call me. help me help me help me help me help me" (or some similar variation)

I did get a response, exactly when I needed it. Rachel's point of view? "Fuck them, you don't owe them anything. You're doing too much now. Fuck them."

Which was the best thing she could have said. I felt better, instantly, resolved that I would, as soon as conviently possible, fuck them. By quitting.

I called my dad on the drive home. My dad, who calls himself my biggest fan, and always knows just what to say to make me feel better.

"Hi Dad. Are you at home? I just paid my insurance, by the way. (small talk) ... So, rember how I just started with the state press?"
"Yeah. What's wrong?"
"I'm thinking of... how do I put this? Not."

Dad's response was remarkably similar to Rachel's, in the the whole, f-them attitude. He said, basically, that when I try to do everything (and it happens more often than not), everything suffers, but mostly, me.

"Sure, it's going to piss them off," he said. "But their opinion is worth as much to me as a warm bucket of spit."

This still needs thinking on, I think. I'm just not feeling very coherent right now.

Today's theme: Fuck.

2007-01-11T21:28:00.000-08:00

And not in the good way.

School sort of started for me today, with Camp State Press, Day 1. To be concise, it was long, boring, and lame. And the entire time, I was thinking, "I could so be at work, doing something productive." I mean, I missed the ed team meeting for that crap! ... I love ed team meetings. Lori bakes cookies. :)

Classes don't start until Tuesday, but I'm already behind. My education story is due tomorrow (very, very little done) and I have a state press story due Monday (nothing done). I'm also still unsure about my schedule- I may have to reschedule stuff or drop a class or something. And I haven't bought books yet.

Here's a list of things that suck:

1. School. Actually having to go to classes. Starting Tuesday.

2. State Press. I hate these people now, and again, I actually have to go. Which is weak.

3. Being behind at work. (Did I mention, because of this Camp, I had to go back to work and finish all my deadline stuff. I left at 9:20, which is a new personal record) I hate being behind at work. It sucks.

4. Gas! Fuck. One day of this Goodyear-to-ASU-to-Downtown-to-Goodyear is one freaking quarter of a tank. Which means, as I'll be doing this six days a week, I'll probably use at least two tanks a week... 30$ a tank... 240$ a month in gas. Damn it. I mean, that could easily be worse, but still...

5. Bed time. It's probably going to mean I have to be in bed by nine. And I'll probably end up with a nutty work schedule again, working till 7 or so, plus fourty minutes of driving.. That's like, one hour of "free time". Which, if I had any sense at all, will be spent on homework.

6. I officially have to say goodbye to everything fun. Goodbye to Friday nights out, because I work Saturday mornings. Goodbye to reading for fun, because I won't have time. Goodbye to games- and I didn't finish Zelda! (Goodbye, Link, my darling) Goodbye to House on DVD... Southpark and Colbert Report at night.... Saturday evening church services... and goodbye to my friends, because I know I won't have time to see anyone until the end of the semester. ::sigh:: Oh, and goodbye to family, because if it's anythign like last semester, I'll only see Mom in passing, and see Dad maybe once a week when he guilts me into having dinner with him.

7. Here's the list of every good thing I'll gain:

8. And the bad things I'm trading for: More time stuck in traffic, both ways; more time at ASU, which I hate; those lovely rides on the packed FLASH shuttles to Lot 59, which I'm paying way too much money for; and being constantly stressed out. Being poor, more often; and parking tickets.

Damnable.

And yeah, this may be a little dramatic and pessimistic, but it's not that far off. This would have been what it was last semester, had I actually tried in school. Which I didn't. At all. And my goal for this semester is to give half a damn.

Damn.

People I'm not going to be friends with

2007-01-11T21:09:00.000-08:00

I had to go to lame-lame-lame-lame Camp State Press. Which is really just a two-day excuse to exercise control over their new staffers. Which means me.

It was so lame! Six hours of forced social interaction. "Started" at 10. So I stroll in at 10 a.m. on the dot (as I told Marcia, I definetly don't want these people getting used to the idea of me being early. It's on time, or more frequently, late) Stroll in, sit on their crappy couch, and wait for the magic. Only, the magic is delayed. By at least twenty minutes.

Enter forced social interaction #1: Jay Dee. (It's code. ;)

JayDee is a loser. JayDee is 26, and still floating around, on some sort of ten year plan for his liberal arts degree. Despite being woefully unhip, he's some sort of entertainment reporter. I'm laughing on the inside.

JayDee tries to make nice with me. Small talk for a bit, after which he says, "You know, I've been listening, and you and I are the only ones in the room who don't say 'like' every other word."

That may have been true. I'm not sure. But the point is, his plan for bonding was to insult everyone else? Lame. I shrug. Which, of course, is followed with the natural question:

"I'm 26. How old are you?"

Clearly, I was supposed to interpret that first comment as, "Hey. You seem mature and cool. Let's be friends." Too bad. I'm six years younger than this douche and almost done with school.

Since there's clearly a lot of people I won't be making friends with, maybe I'll do a series on it. Profiles in disdain. Or something.

Almost painful to look at

2007-01-07T13:27:00.000-08:00

Tired of looking at that other post. If that was any more emo, I'd have to dye my hair black and cut myself in the dark. Gotta go clean up, Cassie's coming over! Wooot!

What makes a hater hate

2007-01-06T22:39:00.000-08:00

Damn. Let me just say, that was as fun to experience as it was to read. It carried on to this morning, too. I woke up, sat up in bed, and rocked my head side to side, enjoying the heavy feeling which I could only describe (last night) as being 'special'. Like a barbie doll.

But nonetheless, I blogged. I've been doing so everyday, you know. ::proud::

Enough chit-chat.

I'm about to delve into tonight's topic. I'd advise, stop reading now. It's going to get messy from here on out.

Tonight's topic of discussion: Anger.

That's right, boys and girls, Alice has anger in her heart. Pretty surprising, from someone self-identified as a hater. But that was the topic of tonight's message (Pastor Greg doesn't call them sermons, for some reason.)

My main source of anger is David. All that shit from him still bothers me. Most of the time, just thinking about him, period, makes me mad. Angry enough to try to cut him out of my life. And before the holidays, I was doing pretty well at that. Hadn't seen him in... three years. Hadn't talk to him in more. Which was fine by me.

Except, of course, when you stumble into one of Pastor Greg's winners, and you realize just how fucked up your idea of fixing it is. Hot damn.

Ignoring him doesn't work. I'm obviously still mad, still carrying the resentment and hate. I'm jealous of people with good relationships and little things that remind me of him hurt sometimes.

Like Zelda. David and I used to play Zelda together, growing up. I loved watching him play video games, helping where I could and asking questions all the time. He used to get so annoyed, because I'd ask and forget the answer and ask again in an hour. But it would be okay, because he would make Link do something funny to make me laugh. Or shooter games. I haven't played any shooting games without him. When Goldeneye came out, I was eleven. I wasn't very good at spy games, because I take forever lining up my shots like a sniper, and get killed in the process. Or I'd shoot glass or other objects, just to watch it break. Needless to say, I never got very far unless we played together.

Now, it's not like I'm going to avoid Zelda or get all weepy over Splinter Cell. That's just an illustration of the good times, while few and far between, that I miss.

So maybe I'm holding out for an apology. Maybe I'm waiting for him to fix everything, to apologize, to make it better, to make dues.

All those times I could have used his advice, guidance, support, ... anything, and I never had it. Never had a big brother to help me when I needed it. Growing up, I was always at the last person he turned to for anything. He'd spend time with any number of his lemmings before he'd give me the time of day. Using me when he could, ignoring me when he couldn't. Or, even worse, when I'd finally aclimated to the idea that my own brother didn't like me, he'd do things to make sure everyone else in the world (except our parents and the grandparents that loved him more) knew it.

Some of my worst memories come from him, too. I have a tiny scar on my hand from the time I punched through a pane of glass because I was so damned mad that he'd locked me out of the house after school. In the aftermath, Dad had him taken to juvie for the night, and me to the hospital for stiches to my hand and to make sure David hadn't given me a concussion.

But realistically, I just want to make him suffer.

I exclude him from family activities, simply by refusing to be in the same house/area/city. Which forces the choice to my family: Rachael, or David? And they always pick me. They pick me by not inviting him over for birthdays, dinners, Thanksgiving. Not asking, because they know it would mean I would leave, and despite how much they miss their son, he's hurt them too, and we all get along much better without him.

Much, much better. Which may be wrong in itself. When David left, it was like a cloud had lifted. I wasn't mad at mom or dad anymore, and less time spent worrying or fighting with David meant more time together.

I'm one of those people that prefers to deal with their emotions by ignoring them. I'm told you can judge how mad I am by how quiet I am. Or my jokes get mean and cutting. And when I'm sad, I deflect by making jokes. And forget about "love". Ignoring the fact that I don't believe in love to begin with, if I start getting too attached to people, I try to avoid/ignore it until I get over it. (Which works remarkably well, btw)

So when I found out, that very last time, that David had played me on his first leave home from bootcamp, using me to drive him to and from places to buy drugs (all the while, promising me he'd changed, and that he couldn't wait to get home and to see me more), my response was, "Fuck that. I had a brother, once. He's dead to me now."

Initially, it was because I was mad. Then, I did it as punishment.

I wielded the power. He couldn't come home, because I said so. Because I had constructed the dynamic. Because in my head, I was saying, "Look how much happier we are now, without you here." And I loved doing it.

When one of David's many admirers saw me, they'd ask, "Hey, how's your brother?" I'd twist the knife.

"He fucking died this summer. How do you think he is??" (I did that to a girl in Petsmart, once.)
"He's in the army. I'm sure he's loving Iraq right now." (complete lie, but fun to see the response.)
"Don't know, don't care." (Gold standard. Right up there with, Fuck off.)

Or even better yet, when the fucking Grandparents called, the ones that loved darling David so much, called asking. "Have you seen David lately?" No, and I've never been happier, I'd say.

But the whole point it, it's not working. I still feel mad, I still carry around the anger and guilt and saddness.

Now, what will I do with all this newfound self realization? Not a damn thing, because there's no way in hell I'm talking to him again. Fuck that.

I was going to title this one, "With honorable mentions at my feet", and post about something pointless, but there you go. Blame it on Past Greg.

6 pills

2007-01-05T20:45:00.000-08:00

Three excedrine migrane, and three of my special blue pills. (Rachel's looking over my shoulder, and I've just now realized, I'm doped up. Let's see how this works out, shall we?)

Today was a day of fun with Rachel. And various other characters. But mostly Rachel, which is good, because sometimes I feel like I don't see her enough. But today, I was her sugar momma. I was the oil J. Martin, she was my Anna Nicole.

Superior court is fun. I went, and it just reminded me of why I wanted to be a lawyer. Or a judge. It's one of those proffessions that matter. To society. And stuff.

This is wooze-tastic. This feels like my percocet, just after my carwreck. With the bruises. But mom stole a hospital gown for me from the hospital. Actually, sometimes I think she just likes to steal thing and she just justifies it by saying she likes that it makes me smile. Thievery.

Things that are fun to see: Children of Men, Chinese Cultural center grocery store, Pocky for Men and boxes of quail eggs, Marcia's expression when you hand her a box marked "Just Black", my cat, Caridee on top model, Matt looking around when he thinks he heard his name but can't see anyone, the Hypnotoad, Peanut Butter Jelly Time, face tats, hooters girls, Link fishing, New York (the VH1 reality whore) Captain Jack Sparrow and the inside of my eyelids.

My head feels like a barbie doll. Remember the way they move? Around, all smooth.

I'm not in love with Cole and I never was. Though I like the name Cole.

Names I like: Caridee. Aiden. Alice. Melrose, Bazooka, Eunice, and Abby and House. And Addison. Lizzie. Marcia's name is like Marcia Cross. I'm going to tell her that next time she mentions Rachel Ray. And Morgan. Julianna Moore. Actually, I just like Julianna Moore. But that' cause I liked her in Hannibal. I want to rent that now. They changed teh ending in that movie though, cuase I really liked the ending in the book. Its hot and creepy at the same time. Thats HOT (Paris Hilton).

I hope New York boffs Boston. Cause that sounds funny.

I really like Hannibal. I do. It puts the lotion on its skin. Precious! It has precious!

Oh no Tyra Banks it taking the girls to Spain. I wish I tried harder to speak spanish.I mean, I've "studied" it for... about 7 years.
Breathing feels special right now. I can feel it. I am Jack's lung cells. I absorb air and introduce it to the bloodstream. I am Alice's broken heart. (Oh no that was emo hXc (lolol cyanide and happyness)

::Ack::

I thought you said "punch me in my goddamned throat.

....

Superbowl is February 4th. February 23 is a Tuesday and the Reno 911 movie comes out that day. I"m so happy. Like in the movie, what did you do for your birthda, nothing.

Here's a list of people I don't like: Eugena on Top Model, Bridgette nielson, Chipper, Hilary Clinton, male models, roses, all people named Guiseppe,

I wanted to read the book abou Eva Braun. I should buy that and do so. I don't have a very long list of people I don't like. I don't like Face tat baby murderer. Brendan.

Goodnight.

How tall are you?

2007-01-04T22:55:00.000-08:00

...

Yeah. That evolved today, I tell you what.

Anyway, courts tomorow. And lunchies. And no worksies. And datesies with Amanda(sies). Big day.

What, oh what, do I want to write about? I'm only posting this (and the hypnotoad) because Rachel tried to say I wasn't posting. So, think, think, think...

Nope. I got nothing.

Everybody loves hypnotoad!

2007-01-04T22:51:00.001-08:00

It's the damn truth.

Postal anarchy

2007-01-03T16:05:00.000-08:00

Soooo, I may have just caused a snafu at the post office. A mild postal patron argument. But I got out in time, so that's good with me.

I was in the post office by my house, attempting to return my Netflix DVDs and mail some book mom's returning to Amazon. Both packages had metered, prepaid postal fare.

At 4:30 in the evening, the post office was packed. The line curled around the lobby, at least fourty people in line, all holding packages. I slipped in, heading to the back of the line.

Three minutes later, the woman in front of me gives a frustrated sigh, and walked out the door. The woman in front of her took a step forward, leaving a moderate-sized gap between me and the next person. In that half-second pause, a round older woman hustled into line in front of me. Blatant cutting. This woman was now standing entirely too close; I could smell her hair and see dandruff flakes. The ladies behind me made little grunts of annoyance.

I didn't say anything. I never do.

Three minutes later, we all shuffle forward a bit. The Cutter, wearing a lime green stretch cotton top, purple capri pants with dyed-red hair, lets slip a package of labels from her arms. She doesn't stop to retrieve them.

So I do. "Excuse me, ma'am, you dropped your labels."

She turns, and I feel the full weight of her gaze.

"Thank you." She eyes me, and my stuff, and having decided that I was no threat to her and her ill-gotten position in line, decides to offer a tip. Share her post office handling prowess.

"Is that all you have? That's not much. Are they stamped?" I show her the postage-paid marks on the envelope and box. "Yes, they're all paid. You could just run to the front and throw your package on the counter. Real quick. No sense in waiting."

Now, while this does make perfect sense in theory, I know that would make the entire line of postal patrons hate me. The postal woman (I wish I knew her name, I've talked to her a few times, and she's quite nice) would hate me. It would be just a generally rude act, and of course, as soon as I did it, someone else in the line would sprout a pair and try the same stunt. Leading, of course, to total post office anarchy as the clientel all decide to ignore the long held, established rules of postal engagement.

"No, I couldn't do that. I can wait, I don't mind."

Something about me, apparently, just cries 'help me'. This woman, who had cut me and invariably made my wait just that much longer, would not relent until I submitted to her will to aid me.

"Well, look, you could slide the box in the slot marked 'metered letters' it looks like it would fit."
"Oh, I'm not sure..."
"Go ahead. Go try. I'll save your spot." She steps closer, to emphasize the point. I turn a bit, and shift the box to my other side, avoiding eye contact with the other customers. I'm convinced, in my head, that they know exactly what my plan is anyway, and they're judging already.

I slip the evelope in. Look left, look right. No harried postmen to tell me not to do it. I pull the slot down, slam the box in, shut the door, and hear a loud thud as it hits the bottom of some metal receptacle on the other side. Sweet success. I turn.

"You're not supposed to do that, you know." The eyes of another older woman stare me down. I look at my feet.
"Well, it was metered..."
"That doesn't matter. You're not supposed to do that." Silently, I'm wishing I could just run out the door, but now this woman, this postal hall monitor, blocks my escape route.
"It's okay!" yells the woman in stretch green, now my savior. "It was paid! I saw it." The new woman, my personal linebacker, looks unimpressed.
"I did that once. They sent it back," Linebacker says.
"Umm... I didn't mean..." (I'm quite articulate, really. )
"Oh, go ahead, honey!" Yells The Cutter, now playing the roll of cheerleader. The Linebacker's lip curls into a sneer, face hardening now that she realizes I'm in cahoots with The Cutter. Clearly, her lesson in postal etiquette would fall on deaf ears if I'm of her sort. She turns, and rolling her eyes so hard I can almost hear it.

She's given up on me, but that's all I need. Her half-turn as she shifted her girth to insult me to her friend created enough space for me to slip out. I give a small wave to The Cutter, and slip out the door.

BTW...

2007-01-03T07:49:00.001-08:00

Not dead. Yay!

What would Dream Alice do?

2007-01-02T19:03:00.000-08:00

I took the pills last night. Didn't help. I didn't feel drowsy at all, and instead, spent most of the night reading while curling my hair. Instead, when I finally settled down for my three hours of sleep, I woke up with a slitting headache, stomache ache and burning eyes. If I'd ever had a hangover, I would guess that's what it feels like. Not sure.

So, needless to say, I'll be doubling my dosage tonight.

As a result, I want to offer this disclaimer: Should I not wake up from my experiment tonight, it was not suicide. Just unfortunate self-medication. So anyway, here's what I want when I die: Rachel reads that epitaph she wrote for me in tenth grade, in Ms. Kotalik's class. Or she can find Ms. K and have her read it. And I want a long list of the things I hated read out. Including people. With pictures. Like a power point presentation. Totally.

Also of note today, I found Bob. Alive, in the flesh(y man tities). He works in the deli at work. The resemblance was eerie, i tell you want. I started giggling immediately, thinking about how I had JUST said I needed to find a bob and cry. I think I passed my giggling off as a response to his "clever" "wit". ... Anyway, out in the stairwell, I asked Amanda if she saw the resemblance. And she did. And it was good.

Work may soon be falling to crapt. Basically, in a nutshell, taking away all of our perks and turning us into secretaries. Which sucks. A lot of nuts. But then again, if you subscribe to my Theory of Life (if one area of your life is going good, then something else will soon fall to crap) then the inverse would lead me to believe something's going to go right soon. But then again, you have to take Murhy's Law in account, too, so clearly, it's all going to hell in a handbag as soon as possible.

Yay for 2007. Wish me luck on sleeping tonight.

If Verizon only knew...

2007-01-01T10:23:00.000-08:00

I could start with a post about the holidays. I could post about my new laptop, or new year's resolutions, or my trip to Flagstaff wherein I did not get to hug a deer like I had so wanted.

Instead, I'll share something I learned last night: Don't fall asleep while texting someone. Now, I'll share a little background before I just dive into this gem of widsom. I have insomnia. I haven't really slept in at least a week. I'm staying up to two, three, four in the morning because I can't sleep, and still waking up early because of work. It really does feel like the begining of Fight Club- I'm half dreaming all the time now. Like I told Rachel, maybe I need to find myself a Bob, with sweaty bitch-tits, and cry. Or slide.

Last night was New Year's Eve. Rachel stayed late to oggle Link (feel free to read her blog for details) and when I was just about to attempt sleep, I got a text from Matt.

"Happy new year"

Fine and dandy. I send of a quick response, continue kicking Rachel the hell out of my house, put my cell phone by my bed, and get ready for bed. I snuggle in, and try to coax sleep by reading passages of a book about infectious disease. (Disease can be fun, too!).

Here's where it gets wierd. I fell asleep at some point around two in the morning. I know, because my cell phone tells me this, I got another message at 2:30-ish, and I responded. Somehow. I'm not sure how I managed that, because I was sleeping at the time. I commented on how obscenely early in the morning it was.

Message sent, all done for the night, right? Nope. I spent my remaining four hours of "sleep" dreaming about texting people. And their responses. It was crazy, let me tell you. And I dremt it with the natural pauses while people read their messages, and typed back. Like so:

(This one was to Cassie)

Hi Cass. You were lame in Flagstaff.

(Then, I didn't dream about anything for about 10 minutes.)

Cassie: Shut up. Where are you ? :/ (she always puts those on the end)

Me: I'm asleep. Happy New Year.

(Pause)

Cassie: Goodnight. Let's hang sometime this week, okay?

Then I dream-texted Rachel.

Me: Whore.

Rachel: Why aren't you asleep?

Me: I dunno. I can't sleep lately. What are you doing?

Rachel: Reading scanlations online.

Me: Pervert.

(That's all I remember from that one.)

Matt: What are you doing?

Me: I'm asleep. Where are you?

Matt: At work.

Me: I like your blond hair.

Matt: Like a lion?

Me: Yep. Looks like a lion.

And that's about the point where I woke up. The first thing I did was grab my phone from the night stand, thinking, "I didn't just say Matt's hair looks like a lion, did I?" But luckily, no. Thank the lord.

That was about five this morning. I turned my light on and read some more, determined to stop dream-texting people. Which is a good thing. Because if I managed to do the first one while sleeping... disastrous. I'm thinking I'm going to start leaving my phone downstairs now.

The icky part about this, is that it really felt real. In the past, I've slept walked, and I know I sometimes talk in my sleep, and I am pretty much capable of that achieving the lucid dreaming state (something about where you can direct your own dreams because you're half awake anyway). But this is silly. I'm going to try tylenol p.m. or something like that tonight.

To make me feel better

2006-12-31T20:33:00.000-08:00

This is Rachel. Not Rachael, Alice, Slut-face, or whatever you're calling this girl lately.

And I'm posting so I can leave feedback comments. Because I feel like it.

Alice, if you don't like, suck my nuts.

See more of me and my awesomeness, check out my blog, A Lieu de Rien (instead of nothing).